Friday, December 25, 2009

Hi There Christmas! Come on in?

Ohhai! I actually got back a week ago and haven't blogged about it. Odd huh? Weeeelll I could go on about how awesome my holiday was with lots of pictures to go with it but it's CHRISTMAS! I can't be bothered with holiday blog on... a... holiday? No I'm going to tell you about Christmas instead! It's not over yet but I don't think much will happen in the next 4 hours so it's b-b-b-b-b-b-b-blogging time!


Your mind has been blown. (Did you enjoy it? $5. Sorry OK just had that innapropriate joke in my mind for a while and a blog that few people read, especially not my family, seemed the appropriate medium. Ahem.) We have a tradition of not opening presents until everyone is awake and ready which means basically every Christmas we need to wait for my father to get out of bed. Yeah it's meant to be the teenager who sleeps in past 10 but no. No we started opening presents at quarter to 12 this year (it gets progressively later each year) and guess what? My brother got... something... whatever it was it was rectangular. OK and I got... a card with money in it! OK no let's rewind a bit, I'm much more excited by the events leading up to Christmas instead...

It all starts with Jesus. OK maybe too far back. OK friend decides to have a Christmas party on the 23rd! I'm invited at the last minute and Lorna too. That's fine I never plan anything more than a few days in advance (Just like my good ol' rolemodel, fictional character and hopeless depressed loner, Rick. Bonus cookie points for guessing the reference!) but there's a secret santa thing going on. I'm great at the secret bit! Terrible at the Santa bit. OK oddly enough present giving has not been the most major of things in my household... we do not get our siblings or parents gifts. The parents give us two things a year. I have honestly only bought personally 3 gifts in my entire life. They are as follows: Lorna's Christmas present 2008, Lorna's 18th Birthday present and Lorna's Christmas present 2009. See a pattern? Good. If you can see you are not blind (and thus have not eaten 1.5kg of sugar in one hit) so yeah thankfully the host dropped by (with her boyfriend... actually he was the one who dropped by to look at my computer, she just came along) and told me to give away one of my random possessions I haven't touched in years. This was after she rummaged around a little and touched some of my stuff... and resisted the urge to clean (I hate it whenever I have a girl walk into my room they instantly respond with "OMG!.... I must CLEAN THIS!!!" Do you think you're saving me from something!? What does having my stuff in draws where I can't see it do me!? WHY!!!) I also discovered that my computer currently doesn't have the capability to utilise two monitors simultaneously which I'm quite disapointed about. I need a convertor apparently. Oh well, they're cheap. Well it was party time soon...

You know the great thing about this Christmas Eve was I got to see Lorna. I was going to see her that day anyway but the way things turned out was great. Sorry for spoiling how the story goes but I'm skipping ahead to the party where my plans changed from going round to Lorna's at 12 to waking up at 10 and going to Lorna "hey want breakfast?"


To which her response was "not right now, I'm tired." (SURPRISE! Bet you didn't see her rejecting breakfast at 10am coming... quite a shocker.)

I am so happy right now. But I feel like going backwards and trying (poorly) to give this story some form of linear form. You know what? Screw linear styled blog posts! Let's have a random story now: one day my brother went to a park and decided to feed some ducks. He got too close and one felt threatened so ran at him. My brother being scared of a small toothless bird that people shoot for fun decided to run away, thus erasing any guise of dominance over the angry bird. As he ran away screaming in utter terror at this common semi-water bird he tripped and fractured his foot. Many people laughed at him at school afterwards when I told them it was from a duck. Let us all now laugh at his pain once again during this Merry season!!

So yeah, back to explaining how I totally got to sleep with Lorna. Think you know how this story goes? You're opinion is wrong! I bet you're all having the wrong ideas here! I bet you think this is a totally teenagery male sorta blog about me going "HELL YEAH I GOT LAID! LET ME BRAG ABOUT IT!" but you're wrong! I'm just not telling you everything because I want to give you some suspense while I blog about this. Let's all take bets to see how innocence or dirty the night really was and a seperate bet on the amount of alcohol involved at this party!

You know what was involved at this party? Cats. They weren't even the hosts cats. No one saw the real cat but we saw other random cats. One jumped on the table and ate the dip. It also tried to eat some cookies. I kept shooing (shooing? It's really spelt like that?) it away in the hope it'd leave the food on the outside table alone. It did. It came inside instead. Oddly enough it let people pat it and pick it up it just didn't like me for some reason. Lorna didn't know too many people so I had to stay by her side almost every moment of the party which I didn't mind at all :) I was not too close with a lot of the guests and new the ones Lorna did better so it worked out fine. Up until we started playing Sing Star and I did terrible. After some Sing Star Lorna and I decided that outside would be less noisy/less embarrassingly tone deaf. Talking ensued with people we knew.

OK that part of the story wasn't too interesting ("Skip to the sex! Skip to the sex!" Whoa calm down you dirty dirty blog reader! Jumping to conclusions and demanding I reveal things in an ungentlemanly manner. I'm blogging here, and you as a reader should have the kind grace to not expect a kiss and tell session of my truly overwhelmingly sexy exploits. Now silence! I am blogging!) but some part of it will be. I got a fluffy hamster toy! See? Exciting! Yeah that was my secret Santa gift that I got. It was from Jack. Real secret when his girlfriend comes up to you and goes "Oh you got Jack's present!" Thankfully no one knew who my present was from except me and the two people who told me to bring it. It was terribly cheap and pathetic. Second hand too! I really didn't have time to get a gift... and the one I gave was actually worth more money than I had on me ($1.55) so unfortunate yes but unavoidable. Don't judge me!

The party went until 11:30 which for a teenager really isn't that late but it's late enough that my mother had already gone to bed a few hours previous and hence couldn't pick me up because it was a major inconvenience. Thankfully I used the same logic on my mother to tell her that Lorna's parents couldn't pick her up either (which was true) but then say that it would also be inconvenient to have to drop Lorna at her home at all. (Side note, Shane gave us a lift home) So then I somehow (quite surprisingly) then got my mother to agree to let Lorna stay at our house. Yay! That is so awesome/unexpected!

Of course my dad was still awake when we got home and we slept in seperate beds. Yeah were you expecting a tale of a saucy sexual encounter? How perverted. Shame on you! I just wanted to tell you the story of how absolutely awesome it was to spend 24 hours straight with Lorna. I woke up on Christmas eve, walked down the hall and saw that Lorna had already gotten up. She hadn't done much though so we sat (yes, sat) and talked. Had a discussion about who would have a shower first then lied down and had a nap. The day didn't technically start properly until 1pm so it was a nice nap. I occasionally would tell Lorna she needed to get/wake up but she was being very lazy and for good reason. Getting up meant not lying down with me next to her. It was very very sweet and nice... and innocent... lying there. Not moving. It's fun. Everyone knows lying there not doing anything is fun but lying there not doing anything with someone lying next to you participating in the nothingness makes it a lot more fun! From now on whenever I lie around and not do things it'll be a social event (but exclusive though. I can't just lie around doing nothing with anyone, it'd be bad for my reputation. I need to do something if I'm going to be with a bunch of people. What will the neighbours think? What will bloggers think?) So you know I gave you all that suspense and made you think dirty things (well... poorly attempted to) and it was just about lying down for a few hours with someone special on the day before Christmas. Not the most thrilling of reading but I personally was very happy and still am happy. It was better than Christmas itself!

Now to Christmas itself! I didn't get any presents (especially not from SANTA!) from my family. Instead my parents gave me money (why we had to wait until dad got up so I could get a card and $40 I don't know) and then my aunt, uncle and grandparents gave me money also. The only people who did get me a present was Lorna and her family. You see I'm becoming accepted as one of their own... I get presents! Only took 19 months (which coincidentaly was the 25th of December when our relationship turned 19 months old) to get physical gifts. I got (from Lorna) The I.T. Crowd seasons 1 AND 2 on DVD! (Because they didn't have them on VHS...) Which is totally AWESOME! It was just what I wanted! (How did she know? It's almost as if she doesn't just check her emails more once a year!) So I spent my Christmas afternoon (after saying goodbye to family) watching most of Season 1 and going "Bahahaha! I'm getting more of these jokes than anyone else in the room! Bahahahaha! OMG A PAC MAN LEVEL 256 T-SHIRT! I WANT ONE!" Seriously though... my mother thought it was weird I recognised that Roy's shirt was of level 256 of Pac-man. (Billy Mitchell is a LEGEND! But David Race owned you! World record for fastest is always better than first. More bonus cookie points!) Is it really not common knowledge about the split-screen glitch in the simple binary programming system of 80's arcade games that prevents someone from progressing any further in the game? It is a simple problem with programming things to have never ending levels based on a byte! It only goes up to 255 which is why the Missingo cheat occured in the original pokemon games. The game stores 151 max pokemon data but then theres 104 more free spaces in which data can be stored and.... oh right... yes, where was I?

Yes well I also got a bag full of gifts from her sister and parents. They got me Braveheart on DVD (FINALLY! I rented it but it was scratched in the penultimate scene so they're pulling the ropes and torturing the guy in front of a huge crowd and then they let him down and they go "the prisoner wants to speak!" and he's barely able to speak and they lean closer.... and then it freezes... AGGHHH!!! Come on! That's his epic final words!!!) along with a book of many Garfield comics. Oh yes, they also got me deoderant and shower gel. I wonder what that was meant to imply... Thankfully it wasn't shaving cream or aftershave! Because I would've been offended. I like my beard. No one else I know my age has one.

Well we all know what I want for Christmas next year now!

I also got a few envelopes with cards in them. I enjoy getting envelopes and always carried some around with me in Sydney... may think I'm weird but you never know when you need to mail something!

I wonder what next Christmas will be like. Fun I hope. I hope you all enjoyed your Christmases today too! Merry Christmas.

I sleep now. I had to actually get up and move around today before 1pm! Gasp! So I'm tired now.

Friday, December 4, 2009


Hello all. Tomorrow I set off to Sydney for a week and then to Tasmania for yet another week so recently I decided to start packing. I've been going round finding pencils and sharpening them. What? Yes well I've decided to do some drawing/writing when I am on holiday so I gathered as many pencils as I could and found all the unused sketchbooks and then my mother told me that no one needed that many pencils so I should put some back. I am very disapointed that I'm only bringing 7 (of the largest there were) with me across the country to draw whatever interesting things I find there. Trees, rocks, hobos even slightly different designed public transport! I wonder what colour scheme they go with for the trains in Sydney. Green like Transperth? (Who I follow on Twitter)

I've never been on a plane before. Does it hurt? I hope not. I do not like hurtyness.... No but seriously though I am going to miss my dearst Lorna a lot which is part of the reason why I've stocked up on paper and pens. I'm going to write her a letter while away! A few actually. Perhaps some more people need mail while I'm away? That's it! I'm going to send a bunch of people letters while I'm away :D Then when I come home they'll get them at a similar time and be like "aww! This is so sweet!" and I'll stand there thinking "OK do you need to read them now? I mean... I'm standing here and all and I just got back. Attention! Give me attention!" So the sending letters thing will only occur in Sydney not Tasmania. Oh! When I get back I'm sure to show you some of my lovely drawings/sketchings :)

Well goodbye blogosphere! I shall leave you now but fear not for I shall return!

Friday, November 20, 2009


5 years.

5 years it took. From the very first day, wandering around in the midst of people larger than me, feeling quite tiny even for my above average height, to this day. 20th November. This was a good day.

We were children. It seemed so weird going from year 7, top of the food chain in Primary school, to being the bottom and realising that suddenly you were in a pool that you had to swim in when you didn't know how but you needed to learn. The worst part was this was the shallow end, but were blissfully unaware of how deep it gets. How much work and effort is involved in that last year. In that last month. Those 5 years. Those 5 years are to acclimatise you to the final 5 exams. I learnt to swim. I learned to float. I learned to freestyle through to the very end, proud, victorious, happy, content.

I finished exams with a smile. I sat and wrote and wrote. I was the only person I knew who seemed content with all their exams. Though arduous and dificult it was to study and concentrate for so long- it was fun when it was only 3 hours from being over, the same time you pick up that pen hoping that it works (hoping that ALL the pens work)

I haven't truly, PROPERLY celebrated my freedom since exams finished. I wish to start soon. Tomorrow. Exams ended just over a week ago but highschool is now FULLY OVER!

I have grown. As a person, as a student, and physically. In all senses of the word I am now the giant. 5 years ago I looked up at the giants in their leavers jackets and never stopped to think about what it would be like that moment it all ended. That time has come and now I am that giant. I am that man who towers above the newcomers, the one who gets to dispense advise and wisdom I KNOW the little 12 year olds will only ignore because they haven't quite adjusted to the idea that they are small fry. Everything is a matter of perspective and children rarely manage to see just how small they are until they have grown.

Over a hundred former students of Duncraig got to look up and see each one of their classmates photos meld from year 8 to present. We got to see ourselves age in a matter of seconds. Many laughs were had, many embarrassed moments were shown, many different phases of hair were shown. Some hairstyles changed colour or shape each year, others just got larger and larger, some were really short to begin with- something none of us could remember- then suddenly, BOOM! The huge hair we are all familiar with. We have changed. We all have. We are definitely giants now.

I don't remember mine but I was told my hair started small then got larger, then smaller, then larger, then I had a beard then it was present with long hair and beard. I don't remember much as I stood there waiting for my diploma. Standing at the stairs to the stage where all the students and their parents would see me take the coveted piece of paper saying that I endured and SUCCEEDED at those 5 years, I remembered to tell myself fear was irrational, a creation of the mind. I'm walking up, I'm getting a piece of paper. This is all. No fear is needed.

My name is called and I remember walking up those stairs. The next thing I remember is trying to hug the principal as a joke, something I had come to previously when waiting near someone. "Oh you should do the moonwalk!" he said to someone else. "Nah, nah!" "You should hug the principal" I said. "That's a great idea! No, I can't do it you do it!" "OK!" So I decided, this is what I will do. I take my diploma and pose for a photo while shaking his hand. I turn to him and hold out my arms expectantly. He tells me to walk down the stairs now. "Hug me." (Pause) OK I know he's not going to. I leave the stage and the audience's laughter follows as they realise I just got rejected. Always got something to do differently. I always get my laugh one way or another.

I also don't remember the short sentences they said about my future ambitions and goals that we had to write down on a form. But I was told that it included going to Scottland and New Zealand to make films. Lorna found that very sweet that I had put down Scottland as a future place of residence.

The ceremony dragged on at times but in the end it was worth it. I've got a yearbook, I've got a few new memories, I've got another story to tell, I've got a new pair of shoes. I still don't know how to wear a tie but I'm sure one day I'll learn. I didn't get top media student for year 12, but that's OK. I only was beaten by a very small amount and it was great to compete with Jacob. He is my rival. If anyone had to beat me I'm glad it was him. He truly is incredibly talented and it was absolutely awesome to be the man he always aimed to beat and vice versa.

Who knows what the future holds? Nothing is certain after all, but some things can be held to be more probable. Highschool will most definitely not be the greatest years of my life. I won't let it. I will continue to enjoy life more and more. I will always find a way to look at something just slightly different to everyone. I will always enjoy life. I will achieve everything I can. I wish the best for all the ambitions of all my friends. Shane, who dreams of becoming employed by Google or Blizzard, has a great chance of achieving this and it would be absolutely awesome if he achieved it. Blizzard and Google are definitely the best of the best in their fields and it will be hard, but I know he can get there. Just like I know I can make those films I want.

I can do nearly anything. Afterall, I am now a giant.

Friday, October 23, 2009

Cubed is not 3 Times

I finished my mocks a while ago I just never got round to blogging about it because Combat Arms is addictively fun (Death Room, 3v3, good close range weapon = I own. When there's a limited amount of people the strategy becomes predictable so I know where everyone is all the time. I rock. You don't know what I'm saying...) Anyhoo, (I don't put punctuation like full stops when sentences end in brackets because I don't know what I'm doing) I have got my results back! Would you like to hear them?
Of course you would!
Physics: %61 (same as last semester)
Chemistry: %65 (improvement)
English Lit: %72 (72 on each essay. Consistent much? Hell yeah.)
Drama: I don't remember but I think it was... %59?
Applic: %32 (or %33...)
That's it.

That's it? But... surely you wrote some funny/stupid answers in some of your exams right? You ALWAYS do this!

Oh fine seeing as you all asked (You totally did) I shall tell you!

Drama: Well, do you ever have the sudden urge when you've got 30 minutes left on the clock that, although you've pretty much given up and you're scrounging for that extra few marks just to make sure you'll pass, that your essay needs to contain the word "Flesh"? I know I did. Unfortunately after racking my brains for a bit and writing a few more sentences I couldn't really think of a way to incorporate the word "flesh" into an essay about the characterisation of Quick in scene 70 of Cloudstreet (Qu
ick Drama students! Look up the scene to see to which one I am referring to!) as easy as you'd think it would be... Well I settled on "fleshy". I was quite proud after that. Then I also drew a picture of Pac Man trying to hang himself but he hasn't got a neck so it doesn't really work. I wrote a caption saying something along the lines of "What happens when Pac Man wants to commit suicide by hanging himself?" and then when I got my exam back my epic teacher Mr G had drawn a ghost and wrote "and does he turn into a ghost?". Lol.

Physics: Oh the ultimate of superfluous questions did reside upon the paper of this cursed exam! It asked us for our opinion. It asked us if we thought that landing on Mars (or the Moon) was worthwhile. We get 1 mark for why. That was all. We get a mark for practically any answer we gave (except Nish, who wrote "Yes. For scientific purposes" and somehow got it wrong. That is the only REAL REASON to EVER go to the Moon or Mars and she got it WRONG! What the hell?) and so it wasn't really related to either theory or practical aspects of Physics. It was pointless filler.

I dug into it and wrote as much as I possibly could just to get that one mark and tell the markers how much they have failed at life for having had this question in the exam.

"This is more political/personal than theory or physics. It shouldn't be in this exam. I think from the point of view of scientific achievement: Yes. It means we have advanced to the point where we are capable of doing this. It shows someone learnt something from highschool physics and cared enough to continue doing it. This question should be worth more for something so pointless. I wrote a lot."

Yes. I demand that I get extra marks for something I don't even believe should exist on the paper! (That's just how I roll...dun na na na... oh yeah.)

English Lit: Only one. Well it was in my essay about Medea (Woo! Child killing psycho b*** FTW) and I talked about how her infanticide was a shocking act that would be looked down upon in both ancient greek and moden society.... except in the case of me. "...except for me because I'm cold and soulless." I got a comment saying "you should exclude from saying this, it needs justification." Well my justification was that you can't generalise about the population or society so I'm the guy who goes "BAHA! Owned!". I'm not really I swear! And for some reason the font keeps getting smaller and I need to fix it...

Chemistry: Nah, nothing wrong with that exam. Did quite well.... yeah I'm disapointed too. Nah just kidding I remember now I did have one stupid answer which I knew was wrong. OK it was to discover the molecular formula of a Chlorofluorocarbon (CFC's- you know, those things that destroy the Ozone layer but are absolutely harmless to the human body and so you can drink them? Yeah. I hate them too.) OK when doing carbon chains there can only be 4 bonds OK. So the outer C's have 3 extra non-C's and the middle C's have 2 non-C's because they bond to C's on either end. Got it? OK well I made my formula C3F3Cl6. This is not possible because that's an extra Cl. But I had to draw this but I couldn't. I went through my working twice and couldn't find my mistake (The working worked except for the fact that I had forgotten the extra Cl in the emperical formula mass so in the end... in other words I should've got 2 instead of 3 Carbons). So in the end I drew C3F3Cl5 and then a Cl walking away going "screw you guys". To which I completely agree, screw you C3F3Cl5! You're so stupid! I hate you... I hope you hate it too.

Applic: Where to begin!? Oh I had an entire hour left to get 9 marks just to get a minimum of 50 marks if I get %100 for what I had answered. OK NO ONE get's %100 for what they write let alone me so from the beginning I knew I was going to fail. This means I get to draw some pretty pictures!

One question had an entire page to work it out. I didn't know how to. I drew a hug landscape of mountains and cliffs that led down to this unknowingly huge ravine. Three little people were on it. The first one was at the top cliff going "Suddenly knowing simulatenous equations becomes pointless and insignificant compared to the grand wonder of GOING OUTSIDE!" (which is true. Terrible hurty burny sun over simultaneous equations any day) The next one was lower down saying "Help. I can't get up I'm stuck here." (There was no connection between opposite facing cliffs) and then one guy is down the bottom looking completely screwed saying "You got problems! I'm right down the bottom!"

A turned a linear and a curved graph into the Opera House with little people going to visit it.

I wrote (instead of answering the question) to something I completely didn't understand: "Have you ever wondered who updates Transperth's Twitter page? I mean surely they don't get a robot to do it. How do you even get the job? Do you have to show a portfolio of tweets? No I will not answer the question! I'm giving you some entertainment while you mark!" to which the teacher replied "Marking is never boring" (but she later admitted it was) and "Interesting point." My point is indeed very interesting! I can tell right now you are very fascinated indeed. Here have a berry. You recieved Weppa Berry. Put Weppa Berry in your berry pocket.

Hehe... anyhoo.

Oh yes! There was one I somehow got marks on where as NO ONE ELSE in the school did :) OK it started off with a box-plot showing a spread of IQ's from 80 to 120 (Woo! I've got higher than that spread. Oh yeah) and then proceeded to ask questions like "What is the probability that selecting a score out of this will be below 120?" Well... 1... "What's the probability it will be from 110 to 129"... Huh? You CAN'T have it OUTSIDE the range! Then it continued to ask impossible things. OK every previous time I have sat down and thought "this isn't right, this is impossible" it doesn't mean I've intelligently discovered something... it means I just don't understand it. Well after the third question asking for impossible answers I had underlined and circled the values in the questions and pointed out "THE RANGE ONLY GOES TO 120!!!" and then circle the box plot multiple times going "120! 120! AGHH!!!" then wrote "It's not possible but the questions keep asking for it! This normally means my logic is wrong but IT'S RIGHT THERE!". I started getting a bit aggravated and drew someone screaming and crying their eyes out going "AAGGHHH!!!!" and a frame by frame animation of a man beating his head against the wall till it bled.

I got marks for that which no one else did. I'm happy.

I'm sure there were others I just don't remember them.

Just before exams the person overlooking (they have a proper name title thing I just don't know it... nor do I care) us all makes sure our individual exams are complete by going "Turn to page 1, the cover" (...) "You shall see the instruction of the paper. Turn to page two. It starts with (few words) ends with (few words)" and thus repeats. She was the least knowledgable person about maths in the entire room. Cubed does not mean "times three" and she refered to all the non-alphabetical characters as "weird symbol". Oh well, I suppose you can't be too picky when choosing people to babysit us and make sure we don't cheat. It's not like she can actually help us during the exam.

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

Mocks (Advertising Works)

OK let's start with the short bit. Advertising works.

It does! You totally think that all those hundreds of images you're bombarded with every day affects your descisions at all but no, it does. Perhaps a long speach on how advertising gets into our brains and manipulates us is in order? No. No I just want to talk about DVD's I got recently... Keeping Mum and In Bruges. Why did I get these out recently? Because I had seen a poster for them... years ago. I remember seeing Keeping Mum being reviewed on what used to be my favourite show (The Movie Show on SBS... before it got cancelled. Yeah... nothing says "You're not different to every one else" like "my favourite show got cancelled.") back when it came out about 2 years ago. I remembered two pieces of information about it: Someone kills people and Rowan Atkinson is in it so it was a comedy. So it never really was one of those films you think "OK I want to go see next week!" it was just there. It wasn't even just there, I barely remembered it ever but when I saw it I decided that I knew OF it so I should watch it. Hmmm. Not convincing enough that advertising works? OK how about In Bruges. Released early last year. I didn't even know what it was called until AFTER I had picked it up, decided I wanted to rent it, handed it to my mother to get her approval beforehand (she gets to decide what I get to watch and apparently anything MA15+ needs tight scrutiny before I can JUST get her to say yes) and she had allowed me to get it... Yeah. Guess what I knew about it beforehand? Nothing. I hadn't even read the back, I hadn't done anything but picked it up and recognised the cover. I remember last year turning through the pages of the TV guide and seeing it advertised and it having good reviews and that was enough. You just need to KNOW of something and when you see it later you'll think perhaps you should get that something? Yeah, I say a review on the case saying "the two funniest hitmen since Pulp Fiction" and that also gives you a link to intice you. It works. After that I knew I definitely wanted to watch this film. THEN after my mother had approved it I read the back to find out why the man on the front was holding an icecream and a gun.

So yeah. Just need that one little thing put there in your mind and suddenly the product becomes so much more appealing. I also rented Juno. It was epicly awesome and not outrageous or over the top to be funny. It was brilliant and had just the right tone and feel to it to have those random lines that seem like normal dialogue just stick out and you laugh at them. They're funny. The character of Juno is pretty cool.

Wonderful short movie review there.

Anyhoo, English Lit mock exam! Agghhh? Nien Agghhh!

I spent so much time studying Chemistry and Physics and thought "It's OK... my Lit exam is on Monday but I don't need to start studying until the weekend..." And little did I know that it was actually Saturday already. Damn, I thought I had an extra day. So I spent ALL of Sunday reviewing notes, rereading things and going over things again and again thinking "It's OK. I don't need to tackle the poetry section until later..." So you can see the line of procrastination here can you? I read notes on poems without reading the poems themselves. Thankfully my exam started in the evening so I had time to study beforehand. I get up, go on computer, and play Combat Arms online for an hour and a half. Well you know I haven't exceded my download limits for Off Peak so the morning is the only time I can play OK? I am allowed to play a video game instead of studying for my imminent exam! You know why I'm allowed to play a video game and spend the 20 minutes before the exam reading the poems I had "prepared" again and again and again?

Because I rock!


Guess how it went? Come on, guess. Say it right now... to... the screen...

It could not have gone...

...and BETTER!!! XD I honestly OWNED (as in PWNED as in "showed a high level of skill in defeating or outdoing the average level of talent required to accomplish something") that exam. I have never written so much in my life before! OK one of the consistent and common feedback topics I get for my in class essays is that they are too short. Yeah I sit and write... then see that every one has written more... and there will always be pauses and thinking "OK what next? Hmm... can I really say that? Is it relevant?" and stuff like that. So you know I aim to get PAST the page and a half mark because at least then it's not TOO short. So 2 full pages is pretty good. Recently I got onto... wait for it... PAGE 3!!! :O And I was like "WHOA!" and even wrote it "PG3!!!" and underlined it and every thing it was great. That was amasing.

What's even more amasing was how I wrote an entire essay (and even got ONTO PAGE 3!!!) in 40 minutes. Then wrote another in 60 minutes... (ALSO got to PAGE 3!!!) which left with an hour and 20 minutes to do a final essay. OK basically I'm feeling quite epic that I've managed to write two essays longer than I ever would normally in less time than I normally have so I'm on a roll. I write 2 and a half pages of my final essay in an hour... and pause to do maths as I wonder how much on average I have written and what a third of 7 thirds is and what that means in terms of page space... then decided that a) it wasn't a good use of time b) was impossible to do in my head because I hate maths c) doesn't matter, I still had a lot to go.

OK remember that I'm on my 3rd page and it has lots of exclamation marks and a little arrow pointing to it say "Hell yeah!". Oh and... then my pen stops working... Whhhaaaa? Don't worry I've got 4 more. 4 more that... DON'T WORK!? I try them all twice even the one I was using before and then thankfuly I realised that it just needed to be written with at a certain angle because it was dodgy.

OK I keep writing thinking that this essay, if giving time, could just go on and on and on and not lose it's flow and still have more topics to bring up when it happens... the never EVER before achieved... mystical, mysterious... breath taking... PAGE 4!!!!

Booyah. Page 4. I kept writing and decided that because I had not much time left I'd just finish off... with 5 minutes to spare. To sit there with the biggest smile on my face not doing anything because I had finished 3 of the most epic essays I'd ever written in my life. Everyone else was busy writing away... and I had never been so happy about the outcome of an exam before.

Monday was a very good day :)

Exams are going great.

They are bound to get worse.

Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Revision Seminar

Yesterday I had a revision seminar. It was the biggest waste of my life. I drew a fish while waiting for it (in the natural sciences block, because the security guard gave me the wrong directions).

It was for Applicable Maths (Applicable... I never get that word in relation to maths. It must not mean what I think it means) and it was INCREDIBLY pointless. Sure, I could blog about it... but I'd much rather show you my notes. They'll explain things better.

I hope you can read that all :) Basically I couldn't read what the handwritten projections were, and didnt understand the words the guy said, and didn't care at all. I'm going to a Chemistry revision seminar tomorrow....


P.S. Some of these were based on what he said. Like "Don't always believe your calculator" and "Always attempt things. You might get marks by having something carried through. Make things up." (He was talking about Venn Diagrams)

Monday, September 28, 2009

Practical Exam

I have missed blogging. It's fun.

The story begins all the way back a few weeks ago. Perhaps two? I don't remember. The drama class (of 8) was in the rehearsal room having our early revision class when the teacher asks me to come up to the front. I was understandably confused, what had brought this on? What was going on? To make things more confusing he then asked me to recieve a hug. "Uhhh........ what?" "Come on." OK now take that out of context and you get one random sick teacher. But no, he's really cool and I probably should've taken that hug...

...because he handed me a piece of paper and asked the next person to come up and get a hug and paper. I looked at the paper and on it was a date... for my drama practical exam.

And it was not very far away. It was quite soon. I hadn't even finished writing my OSP (Original Solo Production of 5-7 minutes) let alone even STARTED working on my scripted monologue (which had to be taken from a play). OK if any one out there doesn't do drama, let me tell you this: having two weeks to prepare two monologues with completely different characters is kinda dificult if you've got other things to do. Agh, agh, agh, agh? Agh! (Indeed)

Well it was time to get serious with this drama stuff. I wrote my entire OSP just about... four or five days before it was to be marked in class (yeah, get marked on it for class then have to improve it for exams.) and I did surprisingly well! Still didn't have my scripted monologue and the exam was in exactly a week. A week! Three days into the holidays (and a week BEFORE my mocks) I have a practical exam! That's just plain unfair that I would have to have an exam when TEE just starts! And guess what else really sucks?

I FINALLY got round to finding a scripted monologue on thursday... late afternoon. I basically started on friday afternoon after school. I had the weekend basically to get ready for an exam I had in the morning on Monday. Oh goodie!

But here the tone switchs from hopeless and complaining... to smug and superior.

Because I totally own. Bam baby! Here is what I did: I got my scripted, recorded it on my iriver (woo! Lorna ftw! Thank you for it for Christmas it's the best present ever) and listened to it over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over....

*5 minute later*

...over and over and over and over and over again. This way, whenever I wasn't practicing it it was still being bored into my brain so I remembered my lines. I did the same with my OSP. I have never walked into an assessment as confident and sure of myself before! (With the OSP that is for the class marking. I walked OUT going "aagghhhh that was terrible!" but I walked IN going "OK I can do this!" - which I did perfectly -in the sense that I said everything without screwing up, not me being the world's perfect actor but still reasonable good- but then the improv and the questions were abismal and I freaked, failed, crashed and burned.) The second most confident I've ever been was this practical exam. An EXAM was when I was at one of my calmest? Yes well I owe it to spending my ENTIRE Sunday going through the scripted again and again and again until I had got it perfect.

I wasn't calm before I walked into the room though. I arrived at St John's XXVIII, got out of the car and heart rate went up. I had never been to this place before, I didn't know where I was, where to go, what was going to happen, who would be there, how well I would do... But I had over half an hour to sit down in a room of other people waiting for their exams to calm myself down. Instead of talking to anyone around me like everyone else was I just sat there... staring at the wall or floor or ceiling or posters on the walls. Yeah, I was some random loner not talking to anyone. Great huh? All I did was sit... and try to regulate my breathing, get my heart rate down and relax. In the end I was guided to outside the door of the room I would be entering in 5 minutes for marking and had nearly succeded in becoming perfectly calm. Which was a lot better than previous school asessments that go "Do I have to go now?.... uurrghh... OK...".

Entered room. Set up in the minute given, and went through my OSP, then scripted then was given an improv to do. I was a 6 year old boy playing football with my brother and I break a window and I know my Dad isn't going to like it. My 30 seconds preparation involved swearing, thinking how bad it was going to be, then one simple plot point: trying to clean it up and getting cut. Yeah, it went alright up until that.... 20 seconds in. At that point I kinda froze and couldn't think of something next so it was over really really quickly. Not good. Oh well. I think I did SLIGHTLY better in the questions. Which was good because in the practice run through of how the exam would be held at school we did questions and I just couldn't answer them very well I just... failed. But in the exam I answered them! With minimal "Uhh..." "Um"s and only one "I would uhh... words... uhh.... you know? OK that sentence was poorly constructed let me try again." Which you'd think would make me disapointed about the whole ordeal but the fact is: I said SOMETHING BESIDES those things! So that was good! I like good!

It actually wasn't that bad. Sure improv failed, could've been slightly more emotive for my scripted in the end and wasn't absolutely perfect answering the questions but it didn't go immensely terrible so I am happy :) It only took abouty 15 minutes and I was FREE! The markers were cool too, they smiled. I thought they'd be kinda soulless unemotional looking people but no.

Now I have a week to study for mocks and then I keep studying until November 12 when I have my final exam. And guess which exam that is?

Drama written exam.

Last exam is the same as the first? Awesome.

Have a nice day.

Saturday, September 26, 2009

Pseudo-Celeb Status

Why do we love celebrities? Before there was Ben Affleck and Oprah there were important people who did things like royalty... back when royalty meant something. That's what we do now, we treat celebrities like royalty and follow them around thinking they're either brilliant or terrible and try to replace them. Then after following them around for so long having them shown to us as wonderful, people decide to just invade their lives and so we get photos of people at the beach or walking around and doing normal things. Shock exclusive photo of Sigourney Weaver without make up looking less than perfect! Who cares? When did celebrities stop being people and start being objects of fascination to study and stalk as if that was ever OK? Last I checked people generally have to sign forms to have their image released to the general public - unless you're famous and you're having a nervous break down. It's your own fault for doing something interesting... you should stick to an office job if you don't want your personal life to be twisted to fit the flavour of the month.

So why do we care when someone we don't know turns out to not be the perfect idolistic person we'd expect them to be (for no real reason at all)? Well I don't. So I'm going to talk about someone else.

Internet celebrities.

They're the weird interesting people who are ALWAYS normal non-perfect people who seem a lot more down to earth than other celebrities so there's no point in trying to bring them down to our level to laugh at their not-even-very-embarrassing photos. They're people who put themselves out there on some website (*cough* youtube specifically *cough*) and got more attention than anyone else. Who says they have talent? These people appear more human to us which... they ARE. They're just random's just like the people watching them. Why do you still feel so special and important if they reply to something you say or comment on your channel to answer some question you asked? They're pseudo-celebrities. The kind that you feel you can achievably interact with even though you're just a little person.

TheHill88 is an example of an internet celebrity who gained popularity by accident. Oh she was so young back then when she rapped about lazydork and lonelygirl15. (Remember when lonelygirl15 was actually a celebrity? Remember the mini-pseudo-media frenzy she caused when we found out that Bree wasn't real? That's the impact of someone sitting and talking to a camera. Never underestimate it.) She has gone from that random 3 years ago just vlogging, to someone who is in two films in production (according to imdb) and has achieved internet status and even had her own little mention on a news story. She now has over 72 THOUSAND subscribers on youtube. I think that's brilliant and truly an amasing thing. How did that happen? I'm not saying she's a bad entertainer or that she hasn't got talent, in fact I think she's awesome... based soly on the collected minutes of footage she has edited and decided to upload for the viewing pleasure of the masses (so technically I don't know do I? And all assumptions are based on someone's manipulated construction of themselves that they screen and select to show) which is basically anyone with an internet connection. Not only do I think she's great based on her vlogs (which, btw, when did talking to yourself become a popular form of entertainment for other people? Is it... like having half a conversation and only the good conversationists are sucessful vloggers?) but to have put up with the terrible onslaught of abuse and haters that EVERYONE no matter how GREAT they are will recieve on youtube. There are always people who are shallow and tools who are excessively cruel just because they can be. She has survived the abuse and not run away completely which is quite an admirable trait. Sure she had that gap of half a year but she's back.

OK see what I'm doing? I'm talking about her life, what she does, what I think of her and what I assume she's like. I don't know this person. It's like commenting on a celebrity. It's just plain weird. I would like to know this person and I don't want to treat her like some random celebrity that I would be thrilled to meet one day in a "OMG! OMG! OMG!" sense because to me they really should be that girl from Australia who got popular. But then... why would I care at all if she's not a real celebrity so I'm not idolising her and don't know her?

That's what internet celebrityness does. It makes you think of people as half everyday people and half celebrity so when you think about approaching this person or talking about them it gets weird. Now I'm wondering, I follow this person on Twitter, I'm a fan on facebook, watch and comment on their blog and youtube channel, read their wikipedia page. How far does it have to go before it becomes stalking? Not just for Caitlin but for EVERYONE. Having celebrity status kinda removes someone from the same "level" so to speak (in people's minds, not in reality, celebs aren't above us) so you think it's OK to read about their lives in the magazines and follow them around but then that's creepy isn't it? But it's... normal. But Caitlin isn't that hollywood million dollar cheque a movie star with her own walk of fame star and such so does this make it right? (I question the morality of Twitter and myspace regardless of what social status a person holds so yeah... but she's just a really good example)

My video I was loading of hers screwed up. I'm on dial-up because I exceded my download limits so I can't load it again because I'm going to bed after this. Dang, and I was hoping to be nostalgic and watch one of her old humorous videos to take me back to the good old days of youtube.

I've lost track of so much youtube stuff... coincedentaly I kinda stopped being obsessed with it when she stopped uploading then got more into it when she came back... coincedentaly. I was trying to go on more and give my channel more attention BEFORE "The Plan" was uploaded so no I'm not stalkerish on that point.

You know if she was reading this right now what would she think? How... weird would it be to read a blog post about yourself by a person you don't know? Is that what it's like to be a celebrity... always having people talk about you when they don't know you, haven't met you but still insist on having opinions of you and talking about you. That's why I've decided that I won't be mean to Britney Spears and Paris Hilton in the future because they're really just people who got our attention and are known OF by all of us (but NOT known BY all of us) because the media can manipulate you so easily to thinking whatever you want. Lindsay Lohan recently laughed when she heard she was in a psychiatric ward of some hospital. It was news to her, she was busy not having a nervous breakdown in some jacket. You honestly believe everything? How sad. So yeah, Britney Spears doesn't need to read another thing online about how fat you think she is or how bad you think her new record is, it's all subjective and a matter of opinion (which, btw, is grossly misinformed unless you know the person personally).

So I'm just this random uninformed person... admiring this random semi-famous person for something they do occasionaly for fun... blogging about how weird the interaction is between the two kinds of people we are. Will I ever meet and get to know this person? Probably not.

Hello to all famous and semi-famous people out there. Have a nice day.

Saturday, August 29, 2009

Computers Run but they Can't Hide

"Mummm......... the computer is broken..." I say after many attempts to reformat/turn on/restart the computer in my room that led to failure.
And so starts the journey of how we got not only one brand new computer but two. Not for me though. We get a brand new desktop computer that looks seriously shiny and made of ownage compared to the outdated computer's we've previous had. Thankfully I get the old computer we had to share as a family (and now no one can complain about how I take up %50 of the harddrive when I'm only %17 of the family) and my mother got a brand new laptop because her old one died.
Well because we now have a new computer we can get rid of the old one we had and give it to you know: Me! Well I was certain some of the files I had contained a virus or two I didn't want to give to the brand new computer so I decided not to transfer any of my files until I had sorted through them. Simple enough... not going to reformat the computer just delete stuff off it. I decide to set up the computer in my room so I'm plug it in, turn it on and notice the mouse doesn't work so I decide to check the back to see if I've plugged everything in right... and I see this very very tiny black switch hidden near the power supply with the number "230" on it.

I flicked it.

The computer blew up.


*Jumps for the off switch*

AAAGGHHH! It blew up! What? What? Aww...

OK, so then I left it alone for a bit... then tried to turn it back on. Nothing happened. I tried later and it still wouldn't turn on. Leaving it alone didn't heal it, it was dead.

"Mummm... I blew up the computer...."

Well, my brother needed to fix it of course:
"OK don't worry, I think I fixed it. I plugged in a new power thing so it turns on... I don't know if it works yet because nothing else is plugged in. Also, the previous power thing plugged into here... but there's nothing on this one that plugs into there... So it might not work at all. I don't know what it does..."
Guess what the turn out was? It didn't work!

Nope. Still nothing. We cannabalised my old old computer that stopped booting up and even tried to hook the harddrive to it to no avail. Unfortunately the computer I had only owned for 5 minutes had died quite permanently.

I remember last time my computer stopped working I went to my friends house and got him to connect my harddrive to his computer and copy everything! Awesome! Well I go to his house after piano lessons, hook up the harddrive and then discover something very very bad....


Irrecoverable. Irrecoverable? Unrecoverable.... CAN'T. GET. BACK. EVER! The harddrive was fried. I really had killed it. Nothing on it was accessable and that was very very unfortunate...

So... much... so... many documents. Sure, I had backed up my illegal copy of Speed Racer with German/Dutch subtitles! WOW! Aren't I glad for that? No. I had backed up some of my youtube videos but none of my flash animations I had been working on. I also lost tons of stories, scripts. notes and even half a dozen peoples phone numbers and addresses. (yeah, I keep them in notepad files. They don't take up much space...) I am quite annoyed...

But don't worry! Because thanks to some of my wonderful friends I have replaced SOME of my missing documents! :) Which I will now share with you... in what I call "Nostalgia 3: Getting old doesn't mean I'm getting smarter"

(Mulder has recently awoken to discover that his partner Scully - named "Shrimpy" because he has no other way of remembering her other than her sheer littlness - has been kidnapped by a psychopath with a fetish for make up)

Mulder was running along the streets yelling at random people.

Mulder: Are you a psychopath? Where’s Shrimpy!? Can anyone tell me the way to Albuquerque? Where can I find my partner? Are aliens hiding in your basement? Why is everyone running away from me?

Mulder sat down on a bench exhausted. He looked over to the person next to him. The person next to him looked back and waved and took a puff from his cigar.

Cigar smoking man: So Mulder… you want information about your partner, aliens and Albuquerque?

Mulder: Yes. How did you know?

Cigar smoking man: It’s amazing what I can find out when I turn my hearing aid on.

Mulder: Interesting… tell me more of this… hearing aid…

Cigar smoking man: In due time young one. But know I must show you something very special.

Mulder gasped and smiled.

Cigar smoking man: That’s right… a map!

Mulder frowned.

Mulder: Oh… ok then… map yeah ok… map.

Cigar smoking man: Now see how we’re here? Yes well if you go this way along this road you can get to Albuquerque.

Mulder: Ooohh! Maaapp!

Cigar smoking man: Yes, very good. Now as for the rest of the things you want I can’t help you with.

Cigar smoking man stood up to leave but Mulder grabbed him.

Mulder: Mulder want map!

Cigar smoking man: Uh… look over there while I run away!

The man pointed at the ground and Mulder instantly started staring. Meanwhile the man escaped down the street and around the corner. Mulder continued staring at the ground.

Friday, August 21, 2009

You're a Nomenclature!

Ever have one of those conversations that just don't make sense? Well a friend of mine are sitting in chemistry, we're doing work on organic chemistry (mm-mm gotta love those hydrocarbons!) and I turn to him and call him Carbolic acid or something similar to that...

...And then things got kinda weird...

"Yeah, well you're nitrous oxide!"
"You're Cyclohexane"
"You're cyclobenzene"
"You're a spectator ion"
"Oh ouch man, that was a serious burn... well you're Potassium Permanganate"
"You're methane"
"You're a group 7 element"
"You're an unsaturated oleate group"
"You're an electron cloud"
"You're an algal bloom"
"You're Ethelyne glycol"
"You're hard water"
"You're a soap and detergent"
"You're a weak acid"
"You're a strong base"
"You're dimethylbutane"
"You're a cathode"
"Well you're the hydrogen spectrum"
"You're the light spectrum"
"You're indigo"
"Indigo isn't a real colour!"
"Yeah, so you don't exist"
"Well you're standard temperature and pressure"
"You're a delocalised electron"
"You have a low electronegativity"
"Well you're dispersion forces"
"You're triangular planar"
"You're the boiling point of water"
"You're an algal bloom"
"I already called you that!"
"Oh... well you're sulfure tetrachloride"
"You're a redox equation"
"You're a molar mass equation"
"You're Antimony"
"You're Polonium. You killed Madam Curie!"
"No, Radium killed Madam Curie you idiot! You're Charles' Law"
"You're the conservation of mass"
"You're insoluble"
"You're enthalpy"
"You're vapour pressure"
"You're Arrhenius theory!"
"You're Bronsted-Lowry theory!"
"You suck so much... you're a conjugate acid-base pair!"
"You're Vanadium"
"Oh yeah? Well you're String Theory!"

And that was when I won! Because I mean, come on, you can't really BEAT string theory now can you as a non-sensical science-based insult can you? Oh burn.

He so got burnt. That was indeed a serious burn. I'm so cool.

P.S. This actually went on for half the lesson. It was very very long...