It's christmas in 2 hours.
Damn you Santa you've never brought me a single present from the day I was born! (....709 years ago...) OK I'll get to that later but first:
It's christmas. Can't believe an entire year has gone by since last Christmas.... feels longer than a year. Last Christmas I was sitting there with one idea in my head and this year I have the same damn idea only changed slightly. Not going to tell you what it is but it makes me smile :) An entire year! Well it's been great hasn't it? I love this year it's a very nice year :D The very first day I woke up feeling estatic and I know for a fact that I shall fall asleep on the very last day of this year feeling even better and wake up the next day knowing that the year to come holds so much for me...
... JUST NOT PRESENTS FROM SANTA!
I need to wake up in 11 hours from now. That might happen... or not. Who knows? I strangely have never been incredibly enthusiastic about Christmas (maybe because of Santa? Yeah, guess what? I'm not going to leave cookies out for you either you fat son of a b***) I am such a boring child (really old child) aren't I? (Oh man so many people will probably hurt me for insulting their lord and master Santa) Christmas isn't that interesting and this Christmas is the only time anyone outside of my family has ever gotten me a present and this is the first time I've gotten anyone a present too. I managed to find exactly what that person wanted so I'm happy :) I also don't like Christmas that much because of all my annoying cousins.... I think I've mentioned this all before in a post somewhere in www.ramblingsofcornflakes.blogspot.com so screw that.
Santa Claus....
... You sir, (You sir!) have visted every single house in the western world except for mine... (Why is Australia considered part of the western world? It's more east than Africa!) AM I NOT GOOD ENOUGH!? Come on I haven't done anything bad this year except set fire to those orphans! (But they were throwing rocks and big people with knives so I decided that rocks + knives + orphans = reasonable excuse to set fire to something) I know I'm good enough for Santa to give me presents... it's just that there's always been something missing in my childhood that stopped me from getting presents from him...
... my mother always said he wasn't real....
Yep. My mother refused to ever let me believe in anything mythical. I remember when I was 5 and people would mention what they ask Santa for and I wanted to know why I never got anything from Santa so my mother just goes "He's not real." Oh come on! You don't tell a 5 year old that! Then I tried to explain to her why she was wrong... and she was just like "No, their parents just sneak the presents in late at night and write "From Santa" on them. If they've seen Santa that was just their father dressed up."
Strangely enough my peers were not open to this suggestion of explaining things and I was told that I was stupid. Santa is so real! Either my mother is lying to me or the entire year one student body was lying to me.... rule one of being a little kid: Parents don't know anything. Even if they say that Pokemon aren't real they're most likely wrong and have no idea what they're talking about. Therefore a random 5 year old who would tease me for being fat is far more reliable than my mother and SANTA IS REAL! SANTA IS REAL!
WHY SANTA WHY!? (Suddenly, during his driving test to get his P plates he suddenly remembers the repressed memories of all the depression and anguish of feeling like he didn't succeed in being a good person all those years that Santa never gave him anything and breaks down in mid gear change and breaks down.... just before the car breaks apart as it hits a tree)
I never got that extra present that appeared overnight... when it was easter I got hot cross buns instead of easter eggs hidden around the house and garden (not that it really matters considering that I don't actually eat chocolate anyway) and whenever I lost a tooth and put it underneath my pillow I woke up the next morning to find that it was still there!! Come on I got paid 50cents a week. An extra dollar for a tooth is too much to ask!?
Yes... truly a traumatic childhood.
Hey what's also traumatic is taking a lot of pictures of christmas lights only to come home and realise they're all blurred. Oh well. My camera completely sucks and if there's any movement at all then it'll blur. I can adjust the exposure so some of the photos I took look like they were taken during the day but can't adjust the shutter speed (unfortunately if I adjusted the shutter speed to compensate for the movement then I'd need to adjust the exposure up even more than previously to get the same image only the camera can't do that either so it's kinda really bad...) Yes it's incredibly traumatic I'm thinking about breaking down and crying right now because of it :P (haha one day I really will break down and cry and no one will take me seriously)
SANTA! I shall find you! (As a kid I thought of ways to capture Santa and the Easter Bunny.... I don't know why... I just felt like leaving traps for them.... poison cookies or something. I am evil)
You cannot hide... I know where you live!..... the north pole! (which by the way, does not exist on google earth... that's right... global warming has destroyed Santa's home... he has now moved to Canada) or... Canada as I just said... curse you parenthisis or.... however you spell it....
Goodnight one and all :)
Wednesday, December 24, 2008
Thursday, December 18, 2008
Australia!!!!!!
OK! Guess who has now seen Australia? Well actually I saw it a while ago I just didn't have the time to blog about it... well I was going to make a Vlog about it for my new channel but I don't think anyone cares about a rambling 10 minute Vlog that is just me talking about the movie without being funny... I know I don't and I can't be bothered editing it because I've got proper film projects to do... real ones. Anyhoo, so yeah I am here to blog about the movie Australia!
OK, Australia... big, long, epic movie with great reviews! (except a few) but guess what? NO ONE IS RIGHT! It was a good movie... not really bad, not immensely brilliant just plain good. But because of it's length it's not going to be one of those movies you want to go see again for a while... now, this movie is made for a reason. This reason is to get tourism into Australia and basically do for Australia what Lord of the Rings did for New Zealand and quite frankly...
It's just that the movie is not appealing to a foreign audience.
...it epically failed.
Yes, Australia is made of fail in that regards. I like this movie! It's good! It was only a bit too long and it was good!.... Just not for anyone who isn't already in the country! You see, this film has an awful lot of cultural things in it. There is quite a bit of Aboriginal culture put into it... and... i'm tired i'm not writing anymore..
OK, Australia... big, long, epic movie with great reviews! (except a few) but guess what? NO ONE IS RIGHT! It was a good movie... not really bad, not immensely brilliant just plain good. But because of it's length it's not going to be one of those movies you want to go see again for a while... now, this movie is made for a reason. This reason is to get tourism into Australia and basically do for Australia what Lord of the Rings did for New Zealand and quite frankly...
It's just that the movie is not appealing to a foreign audience.
...it epically failed.
Yes, Australia is made of fail in that regards. I like this movie! It's good! It was only a bit too long and it was good!.... Just not for anyone who isn't already in the country! You see, this film has an awful lot of cultural things in it. There is quite a bit of Aboriginal culture put into it... and... i'm tired i'm not writing anymore..
Saturday, December 13, 2008
Reverse that mans' Polarity! (Twilight)
Reversing the polarity solves everything! That and sticky tape! Sticky tape that you have reversed the polarity of works better than anything else in the world but is reversed only to Chuck Norris, Elmo and Jesus and so mere mortals cannot waste the limited supply of reversed polarity sticky tape. Reversed Polarity Stick Tape (or RPST) is also used to power Doctor Who's sonic screwdriver. I don't know what that has to do with anything. I've been exceptionally random occasionally recently to be honest (I am far too honest too, I have got to the point that I feel like I don't just need to tell people the truth but everything entirely even if they didn't ask... hence I have a blog?) so I've been coming up with weird things about Monkies in Pinatas and strange things to do with Muffins.... why those need capitals who knows? "Muffin" is now a pronoun. (And you shall worship it?) Anyhoo...
Stephanie Meyer has trapped me in a world without consideration for pace or realism. Curse you Stephanie Meyer and your slow paced yet strangely enjoyable novels about a boy who is a bizarrely bizarre oddity who doesn't age. My word! How shocking! Being 709 I have no particular interest in 110 year old vampires but will still like to see he movie. That doesn't make sense! I get annoyingly addicted to the Twilight series and everytime I get near the book I need to read it... but then after a while realise that I can escape and thus do so and actually have a life... It is essentially a book specifically designed to appeal to female teenage audiences not guys. It creates a pitiful and pathetic female character that very few girls can actually relate to... the only thing is, the girls who read the book... don't know that. OK, sorry to Bella (the person Bella not the fictional character Bella) and Rayne and... Brooke ect and to anyone reading this who is a diehard fan of Twilight (chances are, you're a girl!) because this isn't going to rave and rant on about how good it is but then again I'm not going to say it's bad either. Let me continue. OK, the character doesn't think she's good looking, she thinks she's bland and boring and pathetic and really isn't the most popular person and (and I'm using too many "and"s) keeps comparing herself to these vampires and thinks that people always look and are better than her. I have noticed, as probably every guy in the world with a brain, that girl's will often have the same opinion about themselves as Bella. Now, you take a character that ISN'T ACTUALLY LIKE ANYONE but everyone seems to think they are like (like hell you are people! If you read the book you'll notice that you're nothing like Bella besides the fact that you don't like yourself too much and that's unjustified) and you give this character this goal, this dream, this inevitable idea that she will one day be perfect and she will have the most perfect and handsome and loving and caring guy who will never age, who will never die, never leave you and you can live together in perfect happiness for all eternity in each others arms.... and in achieving having this guy for yourself you also inherently become perfect yourself and all your physical blemishes and pathetic little trips and falls and inability to do anythingness leaves and goes away because you are now an immortal being. Now who doesn't want the perfect guy who is sexier than anyone else, completely devoted to you and will never age to have to themselves?
That is why that the book is perfect for young teenage girls. Because they have this fantasy to escape to of a perfect life because they think they're not really worth much. They think they can relate to Bella's imperfections... but they really can't. I'm sorry people but a lot of you just are nothing like this character in almost every way so it's... a book that is successful because the youth of today hates itself? Because quite frankly, no offence to the book or anything, but each book always starts off very slowly, it's not too intense on plot until near the end when stuff actually starts happening and there's real obvious danger and trying to kill people (or, not even killing anyone) and stuff. It's good but people who are obsessed with it, are girls...
Midnight sun on the other hand...
... IS AWESOME!!!
It's written from the point of view of Edward and doesn't appeal to a female audience nearly as much as Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse and Breaking Dawn because it talks more about blood and internal struggles as compared to confused wondering and long descriptions of how hot Edward is... I love it, I am addicted to Midnight Sun and keep wanting to read it and staying up late because of it! I like Edward... he's awesome (and Jacob is annoying). I really want Stephanie to continue to write it dammit so when I get to the end it'll be the proper end! But oh well, maybe one day.
I don't think I was going to blog about that at all but did. OK, I just said my opinion....
Why do my blog titles never have anything to do with the content of them!? :S OK! I'm adding in "(Twilight)" to the title of this post. Maybe that will warn away a few of the anti-twilight people I know of... who refuse to conform to the masses and read the damn book. Quite frankly why should they give in? (Don't yell at me Twilight fans! Don't yell at me!) It is not the greatest book of all time, it might not even become a classic and not everyone needs or should read it.... I only encourage people to read Midnight Sun I don't encourage other people to read Twilight (Although unfortunately you should read Twilight if you're going to make sense of Midnight Sun) because I really don't think it needs me to help it get read. It has it's legions of followers who are all secretly wanting to be vampires! Anyone dare say they hate Edward Cullen and in 3 seconds you'll be on the floor being mobbed by the nearest teenage girls as the screech their eery death screeches of anguish and hatred at you! "EDWARD CULLEN IS SO HOT! HOW DARE YOU!" and then you be dead.
... I actually wanted this post to be not-serious and funny but it's become very very serious... I am not joking about that last part about the teenage girls attacking you in waves and waves of angry slapping across the face. There is nothing funny about enraged Edward-Fan beatings... it happens twice daily in the US alone.... think about it...
Stephanie Meyer has trapped me in a world without consideration for pace or realism. Curse you Stephanie Meyer and your slow paced yet strangely enjoyable novels about a boy who is a bizarrely bizarre oddity who doesn't age. My word! How shocking! Being 709 I have no particular interest in 110 year old vampires but will still like to see he movie. That doesn't make sense! I get annoyingly addicted to the Twilight series and everytime I get near the book I need to read it... but then after a while realise that I can escape and thus do so and actually have a life... It is essentially a book specifically designed to appeal to female teenage audiences not guys. It creates a pitiful and pathetic female character that very few girls can actually relate to... the only thing is, the girls who read the book... don't know that. OK, sorry to Bella (the person Bella not the fictional character Bella) and Rayne and... Brooke ect and to anyone reading this who is a diehard fan of Twilight (chances are, you're a girl!) because this isn't going to rave and rant on about how good it is but then again I'm not going to say it's bad either. Let me continue. OK, the character doesn't think she's good looking, she thinks she's bland and boring and pathetic and really isn't the most popular person and (and I'm using too many "and"s) keeps comparing herself to these vampires and thinks that people always look and are better than her. I have noticed, as probably every guy in the world with a brain, that girl's will often have the same opinion about themselves as Bella. Now, you take a character that ISN'T ACTUALLY LIKE ANYONE but everyone seems to think they are like (like hell you are people! If you read the book you'll notice that you're nothing like Bella besides the fact that you don't like yourself too much and that's unjustified) and you give this character this goal, this dream, this inevitable idea that she will one day be perfect and she will have the most perfect and handsome and loving and caring guy who will never age, who will never die, never leave you and you can live together in perfect happiness for all eternity in each others arms.... and in achieving having this guy for yourself you also inherently become perfect yourself and all your physical blemishes and pathetic little trips and falls and inability to do anythingness leaves and goes away because you are now an immortal being. Now who doesn't want the perfect guy who is sexier than anyone else, completely devoted to you and will never age to have to themselves?
That is why that the book is perfect for young teenage girls. Because they have this fantasy to escape to of a perfect life because they think they're not really worth much. They think they can relate to Bella's imperfections... but they really can't. I'm sorry people but a lot of you just are nothing like this character in almost every way so it's... a book that is successful because the youth of today hates itself? Because quite frankly, no offence to the book or anything, but each book always starts off very slowly, it's not too intense on plot until near the end when stuff actually starts happening and there's real obvious danger and trying to kill people (or, not even killing anyone) and stuff. It's good but people who are obsessed with it, are girls...
Midnight sun on the other hand...
... IS AWESOME!!!
It's written from the point of view of Edward and doesn't appeal to a female audience nearly as much as Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse and Breaking Dawn because it talks more about blood and internal struggles as compared to confused wondering and long descriptions of how hot Edward is... I love it, I am addicted to Midnight Sun and keep wanting to read it and staying up late because of it! I like Edward... he's awesome (and Jacob is annoying). I really want Stephanie to continue to write it dammit so when I get to the end it'll be the proper end! But oh well, maybe one day.
I don't think I was going to blog about that at all but did. OK, I just said my opinion....
Why do my blog titles never have anything to do with the content of them!? :S OK! I'm adding in "(Twilight)" to the title of this post. Maybe that will warn away a few of the anti-twilight people I know of... who refuse to conform to the masses and read the damn book. Quite frankly why should they give in? (Don't yell at me Twilight fans! Don't yell at me!) It is not the greatest book of all time, it might not even become a classic and not everyone needs or should read it.... I only encourage people to read Midnight Sun I don't encourage other people to read Twilight (Although unfortunately you should read Twilight if you're going to make sense of Midnight Sun) because I really don't think it needs me to help it get read. It has it's legions of followers who are all secretly wanting to be vampires! Anyone dare say they hate Edward Cullen and in 3 seconds you'll be on the floor being mobbed by the nearest teenage girls as the screech their eery death screeches of anguish and hatred at you! "EDWARD CULLEN IS SO HOT! HOW DARE YOU!" and then you be dead.
... I actually wanted this post to be not-serious and funny but it's become very very serious... I am not joking about that last part about the teenage girls attacking you in waves and waves of angry slapping across the face. There is nothing funny about enraged Edward-Fan beatings... it happens twice daily in the US alone.... think about it...
Oh yeah, plus I visited the terrorists lair today and she straightened my hair. I was too tired from job hunting (Terrorists also force me to become one of the working masses for some bizarre reasons) so I was like "meh..." but I wasn't too tired to refuse to let her paint my nails. NO! No, you can't paint my nails... I don't mind straight hair just no nail painting!
I'm a smexy fishy... yes... it used to be a lot more straight than that but I took that picture who knows how many hours afterwards. Oh well. I think I look good with long flowing straight hair, a beard and a moustache don't you? Of course you do! I AM YOUR MASTER! OK, gone back to being weird! Woo!
Monday, December 8, 2008
I Will Miss Thee!
TheWindowOfBilby is a non-profit project: Please give me money anyway! our goal: $500
I Will Miss Thee!
-------------------------------------------
From thewindowofbilby the free blog
This article or section describes a work or element of fiction in a primarily in-universe style.
Please rewrite this article or section to explain the fiction more clearly and provide non-fictional perspective.
Weeee! Ye all be fine hearty lads! Arr I be a pirate arr....[1] (Born March 21, 1299) I am also a blogger of asian descent although I was born in Australia and have recieved multiple awards in awesomeness[1]
------------
Contents (hide)
1 Subject
2 History
3 Critical Reception
-----------
Subject (edit)
---------------------------------------
No, yes, no, it's not got nothing to do with nothing that isn't what I haven't yet said and shan't stall anymore to tell you... or is it? I don't know... I don't even understand that last sentence. (No on does... it's like... an octagonal-negative? octave of negatives... there's 8 in there...) OK moving on, as you all know... it is holidays right now for me. This is very sad because... I'm starting to miss my teachers....
AGH WHAT?!!? What kind of... WEIRD FREAK ARE YOU!?
*cries* waaaahahaha! Why do I yell at myself!? Hahaha yeah I'm... very random at times. Today especially... apparently. (citation needed)
History (edit)
---------------------------------------
Yes, I miss my teachers. They were great teachers and lots of fun to be in their classes! They were all interesting especially my chemistry teacher, who, for a while, was my physics teacher too. She was slighlty absent minded and would make a few typing errors occasionally and it was quite amusing to point out to her that Newton's "Fist" law was not real... and neither were "Fictional forces" (she has a problem with the letter R). It was like having one of my weird friends (who was writing a thesis) teach me it was great! It was fun, and seeing how I sat up the front if I ever didn't want to do work I would merely ask her a question and she'd start talking to me :) It was fun... I've never really been bothered/capable of having a conversation with my teacher that lasts 20 minutes before she realises we need to get back to work...[2] Haha she was quite amusing sometimes and lots of fun to be taught by. I learnt quite a lot about molecular bonds and enthalpy and stuff....
My physics teacher was from holland so he spoke another language.... well... if you asked him too that is. He spoke perfect english! He spoke it quite quickly and didn't sound foreign at all... although he did take bloody forever to explain anything![3] Seriously, I asked him once what units momentum was measured in (I said "is it this?" and so a yes or no would've sufficed)... over five minutes later when the rest of the class had walked out the door I was still sitting there... but at least I knew how momentum worked... I didn't really need to know everything from the absolute basics but thanks anyway! He had a habit of doing that.... taking forever to answer a question that only took a maximum of a minute because every single time we asked a question he needed to explain it from the very very basics and make sure everyone understands every little detail.... no! I'm almost constantly on an A! I want an answer quickly not one that takes forever! Besides this minor flaw (Really not fun asking someone a question... then realising the answer long before they've answered it) he had lots of interesting things to tell us. He knew lots of interesting tricks and was very good at ballancing stuff.[4]
My English Lit teacher! Oh she is wonderful! This year was the 3rd year I'd had her and it's always fun. She's the oldest of my teachers and is a grandmother so it's like having your grandmother teach you about shakespeare. She brings you tissues and once I got cookies![5] We even occasionally had a lesson just devoted to eating food as a break from working :) Lovely woman who I have always towered over even when I was in only 13 years old. One thing you notice though is when you're around a teacher for more than a year you start to notice that they have these stories that they use to make points about things. She has anecdotes that occasionally will come up and when you've been in her class more than once you realise she uses them about once or twice a year... so some people are sitting there thinking "wow this is interesting" and you're like "I remember last year you told that story..." which I don't mind. She even has new ones sometimes (new as in newly told, not new as in time) like the time there were two boys fighting and she goes "Right! Stop this at once!" and she grabs one of the boys (who was quite taller and stronger than her) and he must've been off balance because she pulled him and he went flying back into a pile of rosebushes. Everyone just looks shocked that this tiny little woman jsut threw a big tough guy into rosebushes with ease... haha :D My english lit teacher is your grandma meets the hulk...(citation needed)
My maths teacher was truly wonderful. I never learnt a single thing from her but she never yelled at me for rarely ever doing work... probably because she was too busy smiling because I would do the strangest things in maths! I would randomly ask her how her day was or ask her really weird questions like "In a fight between a covenant elite and pikachu who would win?" I say Pikachu because he is really fast and capable of taking a lot of damage but has really awesome thundershock attack (yeah I always side with the pokemon...) but my friend next to me thinks the elite would win because one plasma blast pikachu is dead....(citation needed) She never knew what to expect and it was lots of fun being in her class. I love using the classic line "Miss! (person) is disrupting my learning!" whenever someone disagreed with me so I wanted them to stop talking... I once even started pretending to break down and make sobbing noises in front of my teacher and her face was just like "uhh....help?" it was so funny![7]
My drama teacher has got to be one of the most awesome teachers on the earth.(citation not needed) He would quote The Simpsons, Adam Sandler and all sorts of funny things along with coming up with his own jokes aswell as draw very awesome pictures of toasters. He was the kind of person who you could talk to about a lot of things (movies, music, dancing, jokes, food ect) and wasn't one of those old people who aren't quite up to date. He wins the award for funniest, most relatable and patient teacher award for 2008[8]. We were a terrible class that didn't really get things on in time which was very unfortunate because he was so kind to us and we did disapoint him every now and then. We also had double periods on mondays and so halfway through he would pitch in some money occasionally when we would go to the deli nearby and buy some food (Lemon Crisps rock! Down with the heathens that do not appreciate the salty sweetness!) and it was fun.
Critical reception (edit)
----------------------------
This article does not cite any references or sources.
Please help improve this article by adding citations to reliable sources. Unverifiable material may be challenged and removed. (December 2008)
My teachers all like me (citation needed) and would love to have me in their classes next year. I got a rotten tomato report of %87 and IMBD thinks I am awesome.(citation needed) My teachers all gave me A's... except ones for all my TEE subjects. I got 1 and 1/2 C's and the rest were B's except two A's in Media. This was only because all my work was stolen by monkeys(citation needed) so if I had handed in my work I would've ruled the world! (huh? I don't think "citation needed" quite does it...)
-----------------------
Categories: Insanity Pointless blogs Teachers
I Will Miss Thee!
-------------------------------------------
From thewindowofbilby the free blog
This article or section describes a work or element of fiction in a primarily in-universe style.
Please rewrite this article or section to explain the fiction more clearly and provide non-fictional perspective.
Weeee! Ye all be fine hearty lads! Arr I be a pirate arr....[1] (Born March 21, 1299) I am also a blogger of asian descent although I was born in Australia and have recieved multiple awards in awesomeness[1]
------------
Contents (hide)
1 Subject
2 History
3 Critical Reception
-----------
Subject (edit)
---------------------------------------
No, yes, no, it's not got nothing to do with nothing that isn't what I haven't yet said and shan't stall anymore to tell you... or is it? I don't know... I don't even understand that last sentence. (No on does... it's like... an octagonal-negative? octave of negatives... there's 8 in there...) OK moving on, as you all know... it is holidays right now for me. This is very sad because... I'm starting to miss my teachers....
AGH WHAT?!!? What kind of... WEIRD FREAK ARE YOU!?
*cries* waaaahahaha! Why do I yell at myself!? Hahaha yeah I'm... very random at times. Today especially... apparently. (citation needed)
History (edit)
---------------------------------------
Yes, I miss my teachers. They were great teachers and lots of fun to be in their classes! They were all interesting especially my chemistry teacher, who, for a while, was my physics teacher too. She was slighlty absent minded and would make a few typing errors occasionally and it was quite amusing to point out to her that Newton's "Fist" law was not real... and neither were "Fictional forces" (she has a problem with the letter R). It was like having one of my weird friends (who was writing a thesis) teach me it was great! It was fun, and seeing how I sat up the front if I ever didn't want to do work I would merely ask her a question and she'd start talking to me :) It was fun... I've never really been bothered/capable of having a conversation with my teacher that lasts 20 minutes before she realises we need to get back to work...[2] Haha she was quite amusing sometimes and lots of fun to be taught by. I learnt quite a lot about molecular bonds and enthalpy and stuff....
My physics teacher was from holland so he spoke another language.... well... if you asked him too that is. He spoke perfect english! He spoke it quite quickly and didn't sound foreign at all... although he did take bloody forever to explain anything![3] Seriously, I asked him once what units momentum was measured in (I said "is it this?" and so a yes or no would've sufficed)... over five minutes later when the rest of the class had walked out the door I was still sitting there... but at least I knew how momentum worked... I didn't really need to know everything from the absolute basics but thanks anyway! He had a habit of doing that.... taking forever to answer a question that only took a maximum of a minute because every single time we asked a question he needed to explain it from the very very basics and make sure everyone understands every little detail.... no! I'm almost constantly on an A! I want an answer quickly not one that takes forever! Besides this minor flaw (Really not fun asking someone a question... then realising the answer long before they've answered it) he had lots of interesting things to tell us. He knew lots of interesting tricks and was very good at ballancing stuff.[4]
My English Lit teacher! Oh she is wonderful! This year was the 3rd year I'd had her and it's always fun. She's the oldest of my teachers and is a grandmother so it's like having your grandmother teach you about shakespeare. She brings you tissues and once I got cookies![5] We even occasionally had a lesson just devoted to eating food as a break from working :) Lovely woman who I have always towered over even when I was in only 13 years old. One thing you notice though is when you're around a teacher for more than a year you start to notice that they have these stories that they use to make points about things. She has anecdotes that occasionally will come up and when you've been in her class more than once you realise she uses them about once or twice a year... so some people are sitting there thinking "wow this is interesting" and you're like "I remember last year you told that story..." which I don't mind. She even has new ones sometimes (new as in newly told, not new as in time) like the time there were two boys fighting and she goes "Right! Stop this at once!" and she grabs one of the boys (who was quite taller and stronger than her) and he must've been off balance because she pulled him and he went flying back into a pile of rosebushes. Everyone just looks shocked that this tiny little woman jsut threw a big tough guy into rosebushes with ease... haha :D My english lit teacher is your grandma meets the hulk...(citation needed)
My maths teacher was truly wonderful. I never learnt a single thing from her but she never yelled at me for rarely ever doing work... probably because she was too busy smiling because I would do the strangest things in maths! I would randomly ask her how her day was or ask her really weird questions like "In a fight between a covenant elite and pikachu who would win?" I say Pikachu because he is really fast and capable of taking a lot of damage but has really awesome thundershock attack (yeah I always side with the pokemon...) but my friend next to me thinks the elite would win because one plasma blast pikachu is dead....(citation needed) She never knew what to expect and it was lots of fun being in her class. I love using the classic line "Miss! (person) is disrupting my learning!" whenever someone disagreed with me so I wanted them to stop talking... I once even started pretending to break down and make sobbing noises in front of my teacher and her face was just like "uhh....help?" it was so funny![7]
My drama teacher has got to be one of the most awesome teachers on the earth.(citation not needed) He would quote The Simpsons, Adam Sandler and all sorts of funny things along with coming up with his own jokes aswell as draw very awesome pictures of toasters. He was the kind of person who you could talk to about a lot of things (movies, music, dancing, jokes, food ect) and wasn't one of those old people who aren't quite up to date. He wins the award for funniest, most relatable and patient teacher award for 2008[8]. We were a terrible class that didn't really get things on in time which was very unfortunate because he was so kind to us and we did disapoint him every now and then. We also had double periods on mondays and so halfway through he would pitch in some money occasionally when we would go to the deli nearby and buy some food (Lemon Crisps rock! Down with the heathens that do not appreciate the salty sweetness!) and it was fun.
Critical reception (edit)
----------------------------
This article does not cite any references or sources.
Please help improve this article by adding citations to reliable sources. Unverifiable material may be challenged and removed. (December 2008)
My teachers all like me (citation needed) and would love to have me in their classes next year. I got a rotten tomato report of %87 and IMBD thinks I am awesome.(citation needed) My teachers all gave me A's... except ones for all my TEE subjects. I got 1 and 1/2 C's and the rest were B's except two A's in Media. This was only because all my work was stolen by monkeys(citation needed) so if I had handed in my work I would've ruled the world! (huh? I don't think "citation needed" quite does it...)
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Categories: Insanity Pointless blogs Teachers
Thursday, December 4, 2008
My Blog is (Visually) Boring
Yes, I've come to the schocking realisation that... my blog just doesn't look any good... at all. Que? Well take a quick look at these blogs!
.... uhhh.... just a sec...
http://thatgirlonline.blogspot.com/
aha! Go visit it! Do any of you know who that is!? That's Caitlin Hill from the youtube channel http://www.youtube.com/Thehill88 (I has faileded HTML code... how do you put hyperlinks in text? :( oh well) and not only is she incredibly awesome as proven by this very scientific video:
I think that's the one I want... and she does some stuff and... yeah I'm not going to give you her life story or what she does because that's just weird. She's an interesting online personality that I've been subscribed to on youtube since the very start of my channel and without her... I wouldn't know what blogspot is.
ZOMGWTFBBQLOLQUE!?... wait what? That string of letters was... gibberish :S (english language just got owned) well I gave you a link to her blog and if I hadn't been a fan of hers and seen the link at the bottom of the description box in her channel I never would've discovered blogspot and subsequently eventually decided to make a blog.... so woo! That's about all she's done for me... besides entertain with her many odd videos.
Quick reason why she's not just another random on the internet: SHE'S GOING TO BE IN THE REMAKE OF PLAN 9 FROM OUTER SPACE! :O! (gasp!) proofs! http://io9.com/5056559/plan-9-remake-is-cast it says Caitlin Hill and wikipedia assumes it's the same one plus she is in independant films why not have succeeded in breaking into a hollywood one? I really absolutely adore that movie in all it's patheticness! When I first saw it about.... a few months ago I was thinking "I bet I could remake this movie with almost the same scenes and dialogue and STILL make it better than this!" and apparently someone else has decided the same thing.... only... they'll probably change it...
HAHAHA GOOGLE VIDEO IS HOSTING THE ORIGINAL!
OK if that doesn't work just go to:
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-7038656109656489183
OK I'm pretty sure I wrote more than this.. my text disappeared!? Anyhoo, all I really said was that Plan 9 truly is one of, if not, the WORST movie... of all time! It truly is absolutely abismal! No one acts well in it at all, the script is so bad (I love the classically bad lines "you can see or measure the atom but you can split it to create energy. Sunlight is made of many atoms") and the story is so stupid ("All earthmen are stupid! Stupid! Stupid!") and I never thought that any movie could have so much incontinuity, bad special effects (even though it is from the 60's) and the lighting... OK during some scenes it changes from night to day to night to day in a matter of a few seconds... THAT is how BAD it is! The directing is the worst I have ever seen! The guy who directed it got a Golden Turkey Award for Worst Director Ever.... after his death! wooo! Posthumous woo! Creepy scary talentless dude wooo!
HOW DO I UPLOAD IMAGES!?
OK I figured it out... that's the poster to the original Plan 9 From Outer Space. What has this got to do with anything? Well... it doesn't actually. I go off on tangents of what I say originally because I don't actually have anything to say to begin with! Haha yeah that's right! I don't know where I'm going when I write these blogs I just end up places... and this one is actually about how visually boring my blog is sometimes... so I decided I'd put in some interesting visual stuff things for you to look at! And what's better to stare mindlessly at than a movie? Yes, lots of other people's blogs are all very boring but mine is very interesting now due to the prettyness! COLOURS! COLOURS! (Look at them) excuse me... I am currently lapsing into insanity... (eeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrrr....moo)
Yes, so I hope you are currently enjoying the weird things I have put up to show you (I've heard that one before...?) and I'm about to get some more stuff up for your enjoyment! (I bet you've heard that one before!)
OK this... is Mew... (Isn't it the cutest thing ever!? ISN'T IT!?) as drawn by Nadou on deviant art (You rock! I don't know who you are and have never even visited your account I just felt like mentioning that this was your piece of artwork so you don't get annoyed at me for putting it here without your permission! Unless you stole it yourself but I think that is very unlikely! I also like pineapples!) and yeah... if you haven't noticed by my previous blog entries... I still like pokemon.... games... I like the pokemon games. Playing with Mew is fun! :D (In more ways that one! ;) mhm!) hahaha ok...
moving on... I have a large amount of strange pictures on my harddrive (strange as in... weird/funny ones not... the other kind you'd expect to find on a teenagers harddrive... no! Don't look at me like that!)
www.xkcd.com/512 everyone! Woo! No, unfortunately I am not too rich if that were the case (that'd be so awesome though! doesn't matter that it can't work...) even though I do have over 1000 pictures specifically designed to be amusing.... nearly 800 of those being lolcats (eee! lolcats can has ma lols kthnkbai......... I feel so wrong for saying that....) and these weird images are all very fascinating so I'm just going to... well... give up on trying to amuse you and take the really lazy and pathetic option of showing you other people's works and just showing them to you to amuse you... even though all I did was press a button...
FAVOURITE LOLCATS EVERYONE!
hahaha that's so cruel....
OK there's a few of them... probably not the funniest ones I have (although the voices and cocaine one just makes me burst out laughing every single time! Cannot look at those for too long or I look weird just sitting there uncontrollably laughing...) but you try looking through 800 pictures of thumbnails and pic the funniest ones... I'm too lazy.
Anyhoo, now you know what the inside of my harddrive looks like... I have successfully made my blog look shiny.... and pretty and colourful.... maybe some day I'll actually post images that are interesting that aren't just there for the sake of having pictures! Oh well...
Hey do you think I need a signature sign off? I think I need one... well... not really... it'd be cool though! I don't know maybe something interesting like a symbol... anyhoo
Have a nice day :)
.... uhhh.... just a sec...
http://thatgirlonline.blogspot.com/
aha! Go visit it! Do any of you know who that is!? That's Caitlin Hill from the youtube channel http://www.youtube.com/Thehill88 (I has faileded HTML code... how do you put hyperlinks in text? :( oh well) and not only is she incredibly awesome as proven by this very scientific video:
I think that's the one I want... and she does some stuff and... yeah I'm not going to give you her life story or what she does because that's just weird. She's an interesting online personality that I've been subscribed to on youtube since the very start of my channel and without her... I wouldn't know what blogspot is.
ZOMGWTFBBQLOLQUE!?... wait what? That string of letters was... gibberish :S (english language just got owned) well I gave you a link to her blog and if I hadn't been a fan of hers and seen the link at the bottom of the description box in her channel I never would've discovered blogspot and subsequently eventually decided to make a blog.... so woo! That's about all she's done for me... besides entertain with her many odd videos.
Quick reason why she's not just another random on the internet: SHE'S GOING TO BE IN THE REMAKE OF PLAN 9 FROM OUTER SPACE! :O! (gasp!) proofs! http://io9.com/5056559/plan-9-remake-is-cast it says Caitlin Hill and wikipedia assumes it's the same one plus she is in independant films why not have succeeded in breaking into a hollywood one? I really absolutely adore that movie in all it's patheticness! When I first saw it about.... a few months ago I was thinking "I bet I could remake this movie with almost the same scenes and dialogue and STILL make it better than this!" and apparently someone else has decided the same thing.... only... they'll probably change it...
HAHAHA GOOGLE VIDEO IS HOSTING THE ORIGINAL!
OK if that doesn't work just go to:
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-7038656109656489183
OK I'm pretty sure I wrote more than this.. my text disappeared!? Anyhoo, all I really said was that Plan 9 truly is one of, if not, the WORST movie... of all time! It truly is absolutely abismal! No one acts well in it at all, the script is so bad (I love the classically bad lines "you can see or measure the atom but you can split it to create energy. Sunlight is made of many atoms") and the story is so stupid ("All earthmen are stupid! Stupid! Stupid!") and I never thought that any movie could have so much incontinuity, bad special effects (even though it is from the 60's) and the lighting... OK during some scenes it changes from night to day to night to day in a matter of a few seconds... THAT is how BAD it is! The directing is the worst I have ever seen! The guy who directed it got a Golden Turkey Award for Worst Director Ever.... after his death! wooo! Posthumous woo! Creepy scary talentless dude wooo!
HOW DO I UPLOAD IMAGES!?
OK I figured it out... that's the poster to the original Plan 9 From Outer Space. What has this got to do with anything? Well... it doesn't actually. I go off on tangents of what I say originally because I don't actually have anything to say to begin with! Haha yeah that's right! I don't know where I'm going when I write these blogs I just end up places... and this one is actually about how visually boring my blog is sometimes... so I decided I'd put in some interesting visual stuff things for you to look at! And what's better to stare mindlessly at than a movie? Yes, lots of other people's blogs are all very boring but mine is very interesting now due to the prettyness! COLOURS! COLOURS! (Look at them) excuse me... I am currently lapsing into insanity... (eeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrrr....moo)
Yes, so I hope you are currently enjoying the weird things I have put up to show you (I've heard that one before...?) and I'm about to get some more stuff up for your enjoyment! (I bet you've heard that one before!)
OK this... is Mew... (Isn't it the cutest thing ever!? ISN'T IT!?) as drawn by Nadou on deviant art (You rock! I don't know who you are and have never even visited your account I just felt like mentioning that this was your piece of artwork so you don't get annoyed at me for putting it here without your permission! Unless you stole it yourself but I think that is very unlikely! I also like pineapples!) and yeah... if you haven't noticed by my previous blog entries... I still like pokemon.... games... I like the pokemon games. Playing with Mew is fun! :D (In more ways that one! ;) mhm!) hahaha ok...
moving on... I have a large amount of strange pictures on my harddrive (strange as in... weird/funny ones not... the other kind you'd expect to find on a teenagers harddrive... no! Don't look at me like that!)
www.xkcd.com/512 everyone! Woo! No, unfortunately I am not too rich if that were the case (that'd be so awesome though! doesn't matter that it can't work...) even though I do have over 1000 pictures specifically designed to be amusing.... nearly 800 of those being lolcats (eee! lolcats can has ma lols kthnkbai......... I feel so wrong for saying that....) and these weird images are all very fascinating so I'm just going to... well... give up on trying to amuse you and take the really lazy and pathetic option of showing you other people's works and just showing them to you to amuse you... even though all I did was press a button...
FAVOURITE LOLCATS EVERYONE!
hahaha that's so cruel....
OK there's a few of them... probably not the funniest ones I have (although the voices and cocaine one just makes me burst out laughing every single time! Cannot look at those for too long or I look weird just sitting there uncontrollably laughing...) but you try looking through 800 pictures of thumbnails and pic the funniest ones... I'm too lazy.
Anyhoo, now you know what the inside of my harddrive looks like... I have successfully made my blog look shiny.... and pretty and colourful.... maybe some day I'll actually post images that are interesting that aren't just there for the sake of having pictures! Oh well...
Hey do you think I need a signature sign off? I think I need one... well... not really... it'd be cool though! I don't know maybe something interesting like a symbol... anyhoo
Have a nice day :)
Wednesday, December 3, 2008
The Limits of the Dead
Bonus cookie points to the person who gets which song that is from... without googling it!
Well OK! Limits of the dead? Well their limits mean that they cannot move anywhere... they also have a lot of trouble picking up guys/girls. Gee it sucks to be dead don't it? Yes... it would suck to be dead...
...which is why my mother can NEVER EVER SEE MY MATHS EXAM! OK my mother is... short description: insane. slightly longer description yet very short in comparison to a proper long one: she is insane and a perfectionist with very high standards. B's are unacceptable.
B's are bad!? I have to get an A in EVERYTHING!? Especially maths which she believes I am awesome at and she and my father are both incredibly good at and all my siblings are good at it and I've previously topped classes when it comes to maths and stuff.... gee wow I must be a disapointment getting only %43 on an exam right? I don't think I am... well I am... but not to myself. Well.... sorta... I did study an awful lot and I really was expecting a %50 but no... it was not to be! In fact, not only did I fail miserably at this maths test but I also have eliminated any A averages I had previously by doing poorly on all my other exams too! OK, I was doing so immensely well in Chemistry I could get %68 on my semester 2 exams and still pass with an A average... I got %61. So not only is that basically the lowest score I have gotten in that class the entire year but I got it on the biggest test of the entire year and no longer have an A average!
Although the %69 on my physics exam, although tragic too and detrimental to my previously A average, did put a bit of a smile on my face. If you must do poorly compared to everyone else on a test then the best you could get is a 69.... percent... (hehehe *immature giggle*)
OK, not everything is a failure. Sure, I have no idea what I got on my english lit exam (NO ONE KNOWS! Why weren't they there? hmm! The English department was sorely lacking in being organised....) and I don't even think my Drama exams were even marked....
... plus I am number one top media student for the entire year.... and have defeated my arch rival who I have fought for dominance over for the entire year and only just have managed to come on top near the end! Mwahahahaha! Watch my media project! Sure, it wasn't the one I beat him on but I have finally finished it and I want the world to see it! :)
So basically... I have achieved the only two goals I really set out to achieve this semester... 1) CRUSH my archrival and become top media student for my year! (mwahahahaha!) and 2) JUST pass intro calc... yeah, so I failed my maths exam BUT... they lowered the cut-off for a C so I still technically pass the subject :)
Remember last exams I answered a bunch of silly answers to questions? Of course you do! You are my adoring fan base.... you looooovveeeee mmeeeee!!! (raarrr! hug me!) and would never forget ANYTHING I have said in my pages and pages of ramblings... or I'd find you...
Well don't worry, I answered stupid questions to these exams too. First off, one I didn't do deliberately....
English Lit:
OK, quick run down of what happened before I get to what I wrote. OK, I sit down, we're given reading time and so I open the booklet to see what questions we have for each sections. I see a question in the Prose section and go "YES! That works so well! In fact, TWO of them are instantly incredibly easy!" then I look at the one of Poetry and instantly go "Yes! That works so well!" then look at the questions for the Drama section and go ".............................." it's like looking at questions specifically designed to annoy you by not actually having any substance or depth to them. Discuss the significance behind the title of a play!? NO! WRONG! We've had that question before and it related to poetry not drama! How do you write 3 pages on why a play is called "Oedipus"? It doesn't work... so I did the question about how earlier scenes in a play prepare you for the end... ok... fine. Sure it'll suck but at least I'll be able to write something on it...
So I start discussing why the opening scene is important in plays. I discuss how they introduce the audience to the characters and the story ect.
"You can tell by how the chorus talks directly to Oedipus and how he was the majority of the dialogue and things are focused around him that he is the main character in the play."
Then I realise.... the play is called Oedipus and all of that didn't really need to be said so in brackets I say "As stated in the title" so yeah... I spent an entire paragraph saying something that didn't need to be said because it's told to you in the flipping TITLE! Grr.... I'll get back to another thing about the English Lit exam later... it's fascinating/I want to complain
OK, in all my other exams except maths I didn't really do anything stupid... well.... besides everything... (oh I don't want my drama exam back... I did at least %15 worse in the exams I got back than I expected I would get as a minimum so considering I think I did abismal in my drama exam I'm pretty sure... I did abismal...)
Maths answers:
OK, some of them weren't really answers... more of weird things I drew on the sides of the paper. Like a stick figure looking over a cliff (I very well drawn cliff) with a stick figure behind it throwing a very large rock at it's head. Then a message next to it saying "I'd like to thank the person who wrote this exam for not including anything about factorising or cubics :)"... no mixed messages there at all! :P
I also drew a pretty awesome drawing of Alien from Alien (and Aliens, Alien 3, Alien Ressurection, Alien vs Predator and Alien Vs Predator 2: Requiem) which I realised, as I was drawing it, is indeed a VERY fallic design indeed. Because well if you just look at the head by itself and get rid of the strange long, hard thing that it has in it's drooling mouth that strangely extends every now and then.... and you get this head right... it's long and slender and has no eyes and only an opening at the front where it drools profusely from... yeah... if you don't finish your drawing and only do the main shape and don't put much detail in it... you'll be getting a lot worse comments back on your maths test than just "Please don't draw on your work"
I also wrote on the top of my exam little things like:
survival guide tip #1 whatever you do don't throw away your old maths tests or papers. You never know when you might get lost in the middle of nowhere and need to start a fire. Therefore proving that maths is NOT useless and is helpful and saves 1.5e(0.01t) over log15 + 5 people a year!
hahaha...yeah.... stay in school kids! Helps you in the forest... Anyhoo, next page I wrote on the top the following:
survival guide tip #2 don't write stupid things on your maths test because it angers maths teachers and they know where you live...
And then under that was a picture of a little bald man with glasses on and blood dripping from his fangs....
....That's what maths teachers look like over here in Australia... dripping in the blood of the innocent...
Then, on a question about optimisation and what the maxium area I could get from 600m worth of wire I couldn't answer it so I wrote:
To discover the maximum potential in the things around us we must first realise the full potential in ourselves... I suggest some deep breathing exercises to cleanse the soul...
Well I know... pretty disapointing only drawing and writing a few things to keep my markers amused but I was pressed for time...
I have come to the realisation that this blog has become very very boring... oh well.... who laughs anymore? I don't... I'm grey... I'm sad... I have become goo... biiiiigg squishy goo that types at the keyboard... rraarrrrr bleh...
Lets never speak of goo being on my keyboard again (hahaha you little kids don't get that joke! I hope you don't at least... you never know with kids these days...)
OK! Back to the English Lit exam! OK, in my injokes post I said "YOU SIR!" then did a victory thingy... well... long story short: I have a competition with someone to say "you sir!" and point at the other person before they can do it back... now, this person isn't in any of my classes or even year so I never have this problem except lunch or recess... (can only say it to each other once per siren) but one person has decided they want to be part of this one-on-one competition and invited themselves on this competition... sure, I don't mind too much... I don't care really...
...but you know... when you say it to me TWICE during an EXAM that kinda annoys me.
OK a certain person decided that they would say "you sir!" to me during the exam... and because it was over 3 hours then the siren would go twice. So they're sitting there when there's a siren in the distance and he turns- MID SENTENCE- and goes "you sir!" as quiet as he can... come on why didn't anyone notice that!?
He broke SO MANY RULES! OK...
1) He brought in a pencil case, which is forbidden. All items must be brought in a plastic sleeve or carried.
2) He had PAPER (with something written/typed on it) which is also forbidden. NO NOTES OF ANY KIND! (Although they probably weren't notes and he never used them... you're still not supposed to have paper)
3) He brought in a water bottle with a label on it. Also forbidden because labels can hold notes...
4) He brought a GRAPHICS CALCULATOR to an ENGLISH LIT exam! What the hell!? Not only is that... against the rules but just plain BLOODY BIZARRE! :S Like... what?
5) He TALKED! He talked twice as I've mentioned....
Come on... seriously how did he get away with that? I don't like that... grr... he also had white out which last I heard was against the rules but apparently it's not... he asked a teacher and it's allowed just really not reccomended.... just cross things out. It takes less time...
He also did a little warm up dance in his chair... that's not against the rules... in fact... it was very amusing :D Head rolling around and shoulders moving up and down as he moved back and forth and put his arms up... incredibly weird :P And if that person is reading this then yes... yes lots of people were watching you going "wtf?"
I got my revenge on those who did not punish the guy who broke pretty much every rule... I sharpened my pencil a lot throughout the exam because I really like having my pencils really sharp. I don't get how people can write with really blunt stubbly pieces of lead just sticking out of the wood... no! It has to be sharp! Everything is in detail because if its smudged or thick it becomes far too impossible to distinguish lines in my writing and it becomes unintelligable! :P Yes, well my pencil sharpenings eventually became a very large collection on the floor as the spread out all over the carpet... I'm sure the cleaner would've hated that...
Unfortunately at the end of the exam they told everyone to clean their areas and not leave rubbish lying on the ground around them so my large amount of pencil sharpenings all of a sudden was a bad idea... even though I didn't really try to make a big pile... it just turned out that way... oh well... the things we end up inflicting upon ourselves...
Well OK! Limits of the dead? Well their limits mean that they cannot move anywhere... they also have a lot of trouble picking up guys/girls. Gee it sucks to be dead don't it? Yes... it would suck to be dead...
...which is why my mother can NEVER EVER SEE MY MATHS EXAM! OK my mother is... short description: insane. slightly longer description yet very short in comparison to a proper long one: she is insane and a perfectionist with very high standards. B's are unacceptable.
B's are bad!? I have to get an A in EVERYTHING!? Especially maths which she believes I am awesome at and she and my father are both incredibly good at and all my siblings are good at it and I've previously topped classes when it comes to maths and stuff.... gee wow I must be a disapointment getting only %43 on an exam right? I don't think I am... well I am... but not to myself. Well.... sorta... I did study an awful lot and I really was expecting a %50 but no... it was not to be! In fact, not only did I fail miserably at this maths test but I also have eliminated any A averages I had previously by doing poorly on all my other exams too! OK, I was doing so immensely well in Chemistry I could get %68 on my semester 2 exams and still pass with an A average... I got %61. So not only is that basically the lowest score I have gotten in that class the entire year but I got it on the biggest test of the entire year and no longer have an A average!
Although the %69 on my physics exam, although tragic too and detrimental to my previously A average, did put a bit of a smile on my face. If you must do poorly compared to everyone else on a test then the best you could get is a 69.... percent... (hehehe *immature giggle*)
OK, not everything is a failure. Sure, I have no idea what I got on my english lit exam (NO ONE KNOWS! Why weren't they there? hmm! The English department was sorely lacking in being organised....) and I don't even think my Drama exams were even marked....
... plus I am number one top media student for the entire year.... and have defeated my arch rival who I have fought for dominance over for the entire year and only just have managed to come on top near the end! Mwahahahaha! Watch my media project! Sure, it wasn't the one I beat him on but I have finally finished it and I want the world to see it! :)
So basically... I have achieved the only two goals I really set out to achieve this semester... 1) CRUSH my archrival and become top media student for my year! (mwahahahaha!) and 2) JUST pass intro calc... yeah, so I failed my maths exam BUT... they lowered the cut-off for a C so I still technically pass the subject :)
Remember last exams I answered a bunch of silly answers to questions? Of course you do! You are my adoring fan base.... you looooovveeeee mmeeeee!!! (raarrr! hug me!) and would never forget ANYTHING I have said in my pages and pages of ramblings... or I'd find you...
Well don't worry, I answered stupid questions to these exams too. First off, one I didn't do deliberately....
English Lit:
OK, quick run down of what happened before I get to what I wrote. OK, I sit down, we're given reading time and so I open the booklet to see what questions we have for each sections. I see a question in the Prose section and go "YES! That works so well! In fact, TWO of them are instantly incredibly easy!" then I look at the one of Poetry and instantly go "Yes! That works so well!" then look at the questions for the Drama section and go ".............................." it's like looking at questions specifically designed to annoy you by not actually having any substance or depth to them. Discuss the significance behind the title of a play!? NO! WRONG! We've had that question before and it related to poetry not drama! How do you write 3 pages on why a play is called "Oedipus"? It doesn't work... so I did the question about how earlier scenes in a play prepare you for the end... ok... fine. Sure it'll suck but at least I'll be able to write something on it...
So I start discussing why the opening scene is important in plays. I discuss how they introduce the audience to the characters and the story ect.
"You can tell by how the chorus talks directly to Oedipus and how he was the majority of the dialogue and things are focused around him that he is the main character in the play."
Then I realise.... the play is called Oedipus and all of that didn't really need to be said so in brackets I say "As stated in the title" so yeah... I spent an entire paragraph saying something that didn't need to be said because it's told to you in the flipping TITLE! Grr.... I'll get back to another thing about the English Lit exam later... it's fascinating/I want to complain
OK, in all my other exams except maths I didn't really do anything stupid... well.... besides everything... (oh I don't want my drama exam back... I did at least %15 worse in the exams I got back than I expected I would get as a minimum so considering I think I did abismal in my drama exam I'm pretty sure... I did abismal...)
Maths answers:
OK, some of them weren't really answers... more of weird things I drew on the sides of the paper. Like a stick figure looking over a cliff (I very well drawn cliff) with a stick figure behind it throwing a very large rock at it's head. Then a message next to it saying "I'd like to thank the person who wrote this exam for not including anything about factorising or cubics :)"... no mixed messages there at all! :P
I also drew a pretty awesome drawing of Alien from Alien (and Aliens, Alien 3, Alien Ressurection, Alien vs Predator and Alien Vs Predator 2: Requiem) which I realised, as I was drawing it, is indeed a VERY fallic design indeed. Because well if you just look at the head by itself and get rid of the strange long, hard thing that it has in it's drooling mouth that strangely extends every now and then.... and you get this head right... it's long and slender and has no eyes and only an opening at the front where it drools profusely from... yeah... if you don't finish your drawing and only do the main shape and don't put much detail in it... you'll be getting a lot worse comments back on your maths test than just "Please don't draw on your work"
I also wrote on the top of my exam little things like:
survival guide tip #1 whatever you do don't throw away your old maths tests or papers. You never know when you might get lost in the middle of nowhere and need to start a fire. Therefore proving that maths is NOT useless and is helpful and saves 1.5e(0.01t) over log15 + 5 people a year!
hahaha...yeah.... stay in school kids! Helps you in the forest... Anyhoo, next page I wrote on the top the following:
survival guide tip #2 don't write stupid things on your maths test because it angers maths teachers and they know where you live...
And then under that was a picture of a little bald man with glasses on and blood dripping from his fangs....
....That's what maths teachers look like over here in Australia... dripping in the blood of the innocent...
Then, on a question about optimisation and what the maxium area I could get from 600m worth of wire I couldn't answer it so I wrote:
To discover the maximum potential in the things around us we must first realise the full potential in ourselves... I suggest some deep breathing exercises to cleanse the soul...
Well I know... pretty disapointing only drawing and writing a few things to keep my markers amused but I was pressed for time...
I have come to the realisation that this blog has become very very boring... oh well.... who laughs anymore? I don't... I'm grey... I'm sad... I have become goo... biiiiigg squishy goo that types at the keyboard... rraarrrrr bleh...
Lets never speak of goo being on my keyboard again (hahaha you little kids don't get that joke! I hope you don't at least... you never know with kids these days...)
OK! Back to the English Lit exam! OK, in my injokes post I said "YOU SIR!" then did a victory thingy... well... long story short: I have a competition with someone to say "you sir!" and point at the other person before they can do it back... now, this person isn't in any of my classes or even year so I never have this problem except lunch or recess... (can only say it to each other once per siren) but one person has decided they want to be part of this one-on-one competition and invited themselves on this competition... sure, I don't mind too much... I don't care really...
...but you know... when you say it to me TWICE during an EXAM that kinda annoys me.
OK a certain person decided that they would say "you sir!" to me during the exam... and because it was over 3 hours then the siren would go twice. So they're sitting there when there's a siren in the distance and he turns- MID SENTENCE- and goes "you sir!" as quiet as he can... come on why didn't anyone notice that!?
He broke SO MANY RULES! OK...
1) He brought in a pencil case, which is forbidden. All items must be brought in a plastic sleeve or carried.
2) He had PAPER (with something written/typed on it) which is also forbidden. NO NOTES OF ANY KIND! (Although they probably weren't notes and he never used them... you're still not supposed to have paper)
3) He brought in a water bottle with a label on it. Also forbidden because labels can hold notes...
4) He brought a GRAPHICS CALCULATOR to an ENGLISH LIT exam! What the hell!? Not only is that... against the rules but just plain BLOODY BIZARRE! :S Like... what?
5) He TALKED! He talked twice as I've mentioned....
Come on... seriously how did he get away with that? I don't like that... grr... he also had white out which last I heard was against the rules but apparently it's not... he asked a teacher and it's allowed just really not reccomended.... just cross things out. It takes less time...
He also did a little warm up dance in his chair... that's not against the rules... in fact... it was very amusing :D Head rolling around and shoulders moving up and down as he moved back and forth and put his arms up... incredibly weird :P And if that person is reading this then yes... yes lots of people were watching you going "wtf?"
I got my revenge on those who did not punish the guy who broke pretty much every rule... I sharpened my pencil a lot throughout the exam because I really like having my pencils really sharp. I don't get how people can write with really blunt stubbly pieces of lead just sticking out of the wood... no! It has to be sharp! Everything is in detail because if its smudged or thick it becomes far too impossible to distinguish lines in my writing and it becomes unintelligable! :P Yes, well my pencil sharpenings eventually became a very large collection on the floor as the spread out all over the carpet... I'm sure the cleaner would've hated that...
Unfortunately at the end of the exam they told everyone to clean their areas and not leave rubbish lying on the ground around them so my large amount of pencil sharpenings all of a sudden was a bad idea... even though I didn't really try to make a big pile... it just turned out that way... oh well... the things we end up inflicting upon ourselves...
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