Showing posts with label old people. Show all posts
Showing posts with label old people. Show all posts

Monday, March 22, 2010

711

OK to start off with, holy crud that was a lot of hail!!! I wish I had a camera at the time to show you all the massive golf ball sized hail stones that nearly broke our windows (and successfuly destroyed other people's) but I don't. Seriously it was scary standing near a window with the loud CRACK! and THUD!'s that were happening. They sounded like they would break any moment.

The lightning was awesome too. Worth standing in the rain to film it on my 15 year old camera. (I don't actually know how old it is specifically, but it's pretty ancient. Hey guys! Remember analogue? Exactly.) It's aged since it started off being hightech for home cameras...

And so have I! Wait, I'm not a camera. No, I mean I've aged since I started out... back in 1299... Well I'm now "711"! Or, 18, depending on how you look at it. If you're looking at it in the correct manner then yeah... 18. Well I turned 18 yesterday but had my party the day before that. Interesting isn't it? Let's all celebrate in the comments section! But really, my facebook wall was just littered with constant updates saying "Happy Birthday!" yesterday. It really never ended... until... today. Yeah!

Well now that I'm legally an adult, what will I do? What will I see? WILL I BE BLIND TOMORROW!????!!! Probably not... You know that feeling you get when you know you're turning 18 soon but not a few days beforehand? That sort of "Cool. I'll be 18. Will this be life changing?" and you think it's not that interesting as the day you turn 18 will just be a celebration (or in my case, writing an entire Essay due on Monday morning that I hadn't done the previous 5 weeks!) and so it's just this small sort of anticipation... and then near the time, it hits you. The bigger sudden realisation that makes you actually stop and go "WHOA!" I was on the train home from Uni on Thursday just talking to someone and suddenly I stop and go "....I'm turning 18 soon!" Yes. That's when it hit me. 3 days beforehand. Amazing isn't it? Now I'm 18... and so far this has included writing an entire essay... and playing Pokemon for nearly 6 hours. I got a DS lite for my birthday and Pokemon off my beloved Lorna! Yay! I'm going to catch 'em all and never ever grow up!

Adulthood so far, has rocked. I have a Kabuto that I traded off my brother and my Piplup evolved into a Prinplup! It's no longer as cute anymore... But I must stress that Bidoof just freaking plain sucks. I just... no! Stupid pokemon! You're incredibly ugly and useless in battle!

But OK, let's talk about my party. I had a purely %100 alcohol free party. By that I mean there wasn't any alcohol at all not that I provided booze for free. No one pukes on my lawn! Odd for an 18th I know, and it probably cost me a few guests... I invited like... 90... 98 to be exact. But I don't care. Because one) who the hell wants 90 people at their house!? two) Thinning the crowd leaves only the best. I got awesome people to attend, closest friends and not just any person I didn't think it would be weird talking to again (which was basically my idea when I invited people. "Hey it's an 18th! Let's invite everyone!"). So yes, I got about 20 of my dearest friends, a one tag along, to attend... and then forced them to play pass the parcel. Yes, I'm not quite giving up childhood easily but I'm sure one day I'll manage.

Pass the parcel! One of the most time consuming, messy, and hard to control games of all time. OK, I had this awesome idea of making pass the parcel with a twist to represent my transition from childhood to adulthood. It was basically pass the parcel only with little cards saying things like "TAXES!", "First Marriage", "First Divorce", "2nd Divorce", "4th or 5th Divorce. DAMN WOMAN TOOK MY MONEY!", "Baldness! Buy unrealistic looking toupee", "Prostate Exam", "Grandchildren", and the final prize was "Death". Grace got Death... along with a violet crumble. Damian got Grandchildren. Jack tried to swap him it for prostate exam, but Damian decided it was unwise. I agree with his descision there. Nina got baldness, but then stuck it to Kahkin's head.

The theme was mythical by the way! Oddly enough, half the people didn't dress up which was disappointing. Kahkin though did try, and came as a centaur. The back half of a centaur to be exact. Rear end of a centaur with baldness? That's interesting.



This isn't from the internet, that's actually what they did before coming to my party. They stopped nearby my house because they saw the sign and were like "We have to take a photo!"

I was dressed as Frodo. I thought it was a pretty reasonable costume for a day or two's work, and then Tash came in with a far superior costume... with a proper replica of the one ring on a proper chain instead of my copper ring I made in highschool years ago on a green piece of string, and even hairs drawn on her feet and a real waistcoat! Basically a very good costume. She won best dressed (which I technically judged, so no bitter feelings there as you can tell) but there were some other good costumes out there. Damian had a druid costume with runes and everything.

I didn't wear shoes because it was convenient and played nicely with the idea of being a hobbit.

My party was fun. I quite enjoyed it a lot more than the 18th's I've previously attended where people get drunk. But unfortunately there are two downsides to now being 18...

...One) I never got a chance to test my hypothesis that I look old enough with my beard, long hair and clear skin to go and buy alcohol without an ID. Two)... Well I've forgotten now. But I'm sure I'll remember.

Was it to do with an essay? I'm not sure. OK the day after my party was my actual birthday! And yeah, I spent the entire day writing and researching (in that order actually) an essay due the next day (today) because I hadn't done it previously. OK seriously, who spends their entire 18th birthday writing an essay? Ridiculous! I didn't even get to get heavily addicted to Pokemon platinum! I had to wait until today to do that and so a day and a half after getting the game I still haven't defeated two gym leaders! That's just sad... so sad... someone comfort me!

I guess the train ride to uni tomorrow will be ample time to train my Pokemon!

Oh you poor older people... fear the future where the most recent generation of adults still talk about Pokemon! Doesn't that scare you? A world where people will have the ability to name 495 (Soon to be probably 600) Pokemon species but won't be able to spell properly due to MSN speak and the internet... (Btw mah essai ws abut culd teh wrld funcshun wifout teh internetz. Ironic that I spent my entire time on the internet researching this?)

I'm an adult now. Are you scared?

...you should be.

It makes my parents feel so incredibly old having 3 adult children now. Haha.

Friday, October 17, 2008

Zombies

Zombies... they eat people flesh... no matter what kind of zombie they are (human, dog... cow...) they all seem to like human flesh. Gee wow being human just generally sucks doesn't it? Come on! Be like Aliens and go for dogs every now and then... or cats. Zombies (for those who don't know) are undead corpses of dead people who consist of necrotic tissue due to their recent death...... they are also no longer living. They eat human people flesh meat and somehow seem to digest this... In fact they are dead and therefore have no heartbeat and cannot distribute any blood to places... yet Zombies are often seen bleeding... This is because zombies are magical beings like pixies (pixies also bleed profusely)

They also do not digest food so obviously do not get fat... as a sure way to lose weight one must become a zombie. This will unfortunately lead to the death of everyone you previously cared about because you will eat them... But you won't get fat... This poses the question: What happens to the human flesh meat that is devoured by zombies? Well I cannot answer that question never having studied a zombie myself... I do not reccomend you study zombies closely because this will most likely end up with you getting eaten... (Because they like to bite... like your mum...)

Zombies are like old people... I don't think I need to explain why. Old folks homes are never destroyed during zombie attacks because zombies do not attack their own (but pixies do... cannabalistic pixies! Pixie murder squad... finding dinner for their young... by hunting other pixies young... :P) So zombies don't eat old people... This also means that your grandmother is now the most dangerous person to be around in case of zombie attack because they will flock around her and help her find children to devour (She may just be one already and you didn't know it... why did you think she hugs you so tightly and doesn't want to let you go? She also pinches your cheeks... TO GET TO YOUR BRAINS!) so all of a sudden a bunch of teenage youths stop being the violent, out of control and dangerous youth, that they are at their young age, into the saviours of mankind for they are no longer dangers to things living but dangerous to the undead... (unfortunately popping a cap in a zombie butt is not effective for killing them... we all know it's just really fun to see them jump with their blank eyes as the bullet penetrates the squishy tissue :P BAM! Bullet to the butt!) Our violent tendencies and completely reckless attitudes combined with stuff we've seen in movies (and therefore MUST IMITATE! :D) allow us to go out and kill lots and lots of zombies with our friends with whatever we can find (Nearly everything can be used as a blunt weapon as any teenager will tell you) and our lack of morals and lack of social skills due to our over computer use and our desensitised reactions to gore and death from watching movies make killing your best friend because they've been bitten all that much easier...

... mwahahahahaha... (Don't go zombie hunting with me... I hog the sniper rifle)

Zombies are also funny when they dance...Zombies are also good at Elvis impersonations for no real reason...

... hehehe dancing zombies...