Saturday, February 28, 2009


"Why are we stopping? Do you smell something?"
"Rar! I'm a dinosaur!"
"What do you smell?"

Dinosaurs are very large and very dead creatures from a land before time (Littlefoot!) and hence cannot harm you in any way..... Unless.... They travel FORWARD IN TIME!!! OH NOES! (Oh noes indeeds!) And all of a sudden the streets are filled with a range of terrible lizards the world has not witnessed since 65 million years ago and nothing you do can stop them! (Except for maybe... I don't know... SHOOT them!?) So what are you going to do now that the world is inhabited by life sized versions of your plastic dinosaur toys? Run and hide of course! It's the end of the world and only someone who likes killing endangered species can help!


They (using thier super-powered minds of pure evil) will transform their whaling ships into killer giant robots that will hunt down your pesky T-rexes and Stegasaurus's (which are herbivores but are still kinda deadly if you go near them) and harpoon them! (Get ready for some HARPOON! HARPOON! HARPOON! action! action! ACTION!) BAM! We suddenly don't care that they're comitting genocide because it's helping us live! (yay! life!) But what happens when Japan has a thousand dead corpses of dinosaurs and several billion dollars worth of harpooning weaponry left? Well it's simple... we bring back the mammaths and harpoon them instead! YEAH! (or alternatively melt the harpoons down and turn them into medical equipment... you know... the sane thing to do....) So now we've got a thousand dead dinosaurs and a thousand dead mammaths and a very rich Japanese harpoon salesman who is sitting there going "mwahahaha!" (What's the Japanese translation of maniacal laughter? Answer: Maniacal laughter is universal. No matter where you go, everyone will think you're crazy :P) and the world is safe once again....

...except from terrorism... maybe we should just harpoon the mountains in the middle east and see if we catch anything? Hmm... that might be considered reckless, irresponsible and downright retarded....

For more dinosaurs:

1 comment:

Bella said...

everyone thinks everyone else is crazy already so if someone is going all mwahahaha on you then you would just be like 'well i knew you were crazy anyway. its expected that japanese people would do lots of evil laughing because they are quite evil. maybe we should bring back dinosaurs just in japan so that they give the whales a break?

hehe GO WHALES! i lurve whales they are so prettiful and graceful. unless you harpoon them or they get washed up on a beach.

Bella x